The loss of a newborn baby is a profound tragedy, but it becomes even more agonizing when a mother is left to endure this immense grief without the support of her partner, who has vanished without a trace.

A user asked the forum, Am I wrong for not trying harder to let my ex know our son passed? 


Leave me alone. Dismal pregnant woman turning from man and lamenting
Image Credit; Deposit Photos

The Original poster ( OP ) and her partner had been together for four years when she found out she was pregnant. OP felt she didn’t want the child as her work offered potential advances for her position, and she was excited about it. 

But discussing it a lot, OP and her partner decided to have that baby.


Upset pregnant woman crying, problems, sad, depression woman.
Image Credit; Deposit Photos

When OP was around 20 weeks pregnant already, OP’s partner disappeared. OP couldn’t contact her partner, and he didn’t respond to her calls and messages. 


Image Credits: Deposit Photos

OP got worried and messaged her partner’s mother and found out that he was living with another girl, and OP was overwhelmed by this situation. OP’s partner kept paying his part of the bills to OP’s bank account without any contact. 

OP even tried going over, but nothing changed. 


pregnant woman sad
Image Credits: Antonio Guillem, Shutterstock

When OP was around 27 weeks pregnant, she gave up trying to contact her partner and even decided not to cry over what had happened. 


The portrait of alarmed young woman with shocked facial expression
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

OP decided to go on with being a single mother. So, OP brought everything she needed for the next couple of weeks and set it all up. At 31 weeks, OP started getting pain. But that was just Braxton hicks. 

But before OP turned 32 weeks pregnant, her water broke, and she went into labor, and the baby came very quickly. 


Upset young pregnant woman crying and sitting on sofa at home
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

OP’s baby went directly to NICU ( Neonatal Intensive Care Unit ). Still, OP tried to message and call her ex and his mother, but they didn’t respond. 

Lesser than a week after birth, OP’s son passed away due to early birth complications. 


Worried, sad business woman sitting by the table. Isolated on white.
Image Credit; Deposit Photos

OP again tried to contact her Ex and his mother, but they didn’t respond. For the next few days, OP felt blurred. With the help of her father and mother, OP arranged her son’s funeral. 


African woman with curly hair standing over pink background doing stop gesture with hands palms, angry and frustration expression
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

OP’s father and mother also tried contacting OP’s ex and his mother, but they didn’t respond.  OP assumed they were all blocked, but she didn’t care as she was broke then. 

OP’s son’s funeral passed, and OP felt horrible and beautiful simultaneously. At this point, OP stopped messaging her ex and also told her parents not to bother after the funeral had passed. 


crying woman
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

After five months of OP’s son’s birth and death, OP’s ex turned up. OP wasn’t home when he came, and he could see that OP’s flat was not set up to accommodate a small child. 


Young fashion indian woman keeping eyes opened to find a success opportunity.
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

When OP returned home, her ex was there, and he demanded to see his baby. OP broke down and told him what had happened. OP expressed his sadness and anger. OP addressed that she never saw him so sad and angry. 

OP’s ex stormed out, slamming the door his way out. 


wtf woman (1)
Image Credit: Cookie Studio, Shutterstock.

OP got a nasty call from her ex’s mother and his siblings within half an hour. They all asked OP how dare she hide something so serious. 


Young hispanic woman wearing glasses crazy and scared with hands on head, afraid and surprised of shock with open mouth
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

OP says that she tried, but she couldn’t keep trying. It has been three weeks since OP’s ex and his family have been awful to her. OP was speaking to her sister that weekend, and she said that it was bad that she didn’t keep trying and OP’s ex’s partner and his family deserve to know. 

OP says she tried so hard to let him know, and then she struggled too. 

OP asks Am I wrong for not trying hard. 


unsatisfied woman shows thumbs down and looking at camera. portrait of emotional cute, beautiful woman with makeup and long hair in pink dress, studio shot isolated on light brown or beige background
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

“He ABANDONED you while you were pregnant, and he and his family ignored your messages and attempts to contact you.

You are the opposite of an AH. I am so sorry for your experience, and I suggest changing the locks and cutting them off completely.”


Photo of shocked emotional young beautiful blonde woman with two horns with sincere emotions wearing hipster bright blue hoodie isolated over red background with free space. Wow concept
Image Credits: Jasen Wright, Shutterstock

“Absolutely he knew. And all that his “anger” is, is a giant display of guilt. Trying to deflect blame on OP because, really, how could you live with yourself if you abandoned your partner and unborn child, and then blocked all contact, did not check in near or after the due date, did not check in when you heard the news about the complications/baby’s passing, then realized the huge mistake you made and decided to show up finally. How do you look yourself in the face after that? The answer is deep, deep denial and avoidance of accountability.

OP, you are not a jerk, and don’t let these monsters make you think you are for one second. The failure was theirs, whether they were willing to admit it. The guilt is on them, not you.“


wtf woman on white non american
Image Credits: pathdoc, Shutterstock

“Honestly, I don’t care for him and his family.

You tried contacting them before and after it happened, and nothing. Then he just shows up like he didn’t abandon you at such a fragile time.

Honestly, if that was me & I tried contacting the dad/family & heard nothing, I wouldn’t bother either because planning a baby’s funeral would be my top priority. I was not chasing someone who had left.”

Brother Furious As Sister Declines His Invitation For “Overflow Wedding”. Says, “He Needs To Make The Bride Happy”. Netizens Think He Is Crazy. You Decide

Unhappy middle aged spouses experiencing crisis in marriage, upset husband and wife standing next to each other at kitchen, having quarrel, woman crying, copy space. Conflicts in relationships
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

Brother’s wedding is an important event but can there a reason big enough for you to miss it? You decide who is a jerk.

Sister Refused To Host Nephew’s Birthday Party At Her House. Says “He Isn’t Allowed In My House”. We Think She Has A Point.

Image Credits: Deposit Photos

Is it reasonable for a woman to refuse to host her nephew’s birthday party at her home because she was unhappy with his behavior there? You Decide.

Woman Refuses To Move Aside On The Hiking Trail For A Group. Says, “You’re Rude”. Husband Requests Not To Escalate The Situation. Is He Right?

Beautiful Woman Climbing on the High Rock in the Mountains. Adventure and Extreme Sport Concept
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

Is it okay to walk casually in a large group while you’re on a hiking trail and not care to make space for other people? You decide.

Groom Shocked As To-Be-Bride Forgets About His Daughter’s Peanut Allergy. Says, “I Don’t Listen Well”. Thinks She is Right.

Image Credits: kravik93, Shutterstock

How would you respond if your negligence resulted in a child’s hospitalization and a wedding cancellation? An internet user asked, “Am I a jerk”. You decide.

Father Demands Daughter Split The Inheritance Equally Despite His Mother Giving Everything To One Granddaughter. Says, “She Intentionally Set It Up For The Daughter To Fail In It”. Is This Reasonable?

Clear expressions of intense discomfort and fear. Troubled by bad news, she's in turmoil, urgently needing assistance and solutions
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

No matter how logical you think you’re being, questioning a dead person’s will and wanting to make changes as you please is not at all… read more.

This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.

Similar Posts