People should know the difference between what they need to know and what they want to know. In one case, a boyfriend demanded to know his girlfriend’s pen name, believing he had the right to do so.
A user asked on a popular forum, Am I wrong for demanding my girlfriend tell me her author’s pen name? Here is the full story:
The Original Poster (OP) is a 32-year-old man dating 32-year-old Siobhan for 6 months. She had always been very vague about her profession.
What Does She Do
She made ambiguous statements about working from home and writing but never gave concrete details. Recently, one of her friends mentioned something, and OP finally dragged it out of her.
She Is An Author
She was an author; she wrote and self-published romance and erotica stories and novels. Although not wealthy, she was able to support herself through her writing. OP googled her name and couldn’t find anything, so OP confronted her about that. OP demanded that she give him the pen name so he could see her work and understand what she does.
What Happened Next?
She refused and said that she didn’t want it to be leaked, even by accident. OP accused Siobhan of not trusting him, but she still refused to give him her pen name, which was quite frustrating for him.
OP Tried A More Friendly Approach
OP tried a more friendly approach and told her he wanted to know her fantasies to try that out with her. She told him that what she wrote were not her fantasies but those of her readers. Despite this, she remained firm in her decision to keep her pen name a secret from him.
What Did OP Do
At night OP tried to check her laptop for her pen name, but she changed her password before bed. OP was annoyed and told her that she didn’t trust him. He argued that he had a right to know her pen name, as it was necessary to understand who she was truly.
Siobhan Was Enraged
Siobhan was enraged when she discovered that OP had tried to check her laptop, and she told him to leave. As he went, he clarified that he expected her to apologize for her behavior and provide him with her pen name. In response, Siobhan called him a jerk.