Traditional honeymoons are typically romantic getaways for newlyweds to relax and celebrate their marriage. However, more and more couples are choosing to go on family vacations in place of their honeymoons. There are many reasons for this trend, such as having children already, wanting to spend more time with family, or simply wanting a more affordable and adventurous honeymoon.
A user asked, Am I wrong for agreeing to go on a family vacation in place of our honeymoon? And we want to hear from you.
The Original Poster’s (OP) family and family friends go on vacation together every year. This has been a tradition since OP was maybe eleven years old, and he is now 27.
Each year, OP’s parents and the other family’s parents alternate who plans and pays for the vacation. This year is OP’s family friends’ turn.
OP is getting married in just a few weeks. He and his fiance planned their honeymoon towards the end of the year but haven’t put specific plans in place yet. OP works for his dad and can get off whenever he wants, but she only has so much PTO, so they’re trying to be strategic with the plans.
What Does OP Say
OP says, “I told everyone I would likely have to skip the vacation this year because of my fiancée’s work situation and our honeymoon.”
What Did OP’s Dad Do?
Last week, OP’s “bonus dad” came to him and told him he had booked a room for OP and his girlfriend. He said they were welcome to come along too if she changed her mind, but he was insistent on the family being together for the trip.
What Does OP Say
OP says, “Honestly, nothing can beat the vacations we take. The places are great, and the company is even greater. My sister is so busy these days and lives out of state, so I get to catch up with her. The family we travel with has three sons, some of my closest friends. Beyond that, you can’t beat an all-expenses paid holiday.”
What Did OP Do Next?
OP told his fiancée about this, and she’s furious he didn’t immediately shut it down. OP told her they weren’t required to do family activities constantly, which could efficiently serve as part one of their honeymoon.
They haven’t started planning, so there are no real plans to derail, and they can have their actual honeymoon as a first-anniversary celebration since they weren’t planning on going right after their wedding anyway.
OP wants to know if he is a jerk
Here is what others say
You Could Have Checked With Your Fiance First
“You are wrong. The correct response was, “I don’t know. Let me check with my fiancée first since we haven’t set a date for the honeymoon yet.” You need to pick your fiancée (who IS your family now) over your natal family. If you can’t do that, don’t marry her, for her sake.”
Your Family Vacation Happens Every Year
“Not only that but the fact that the family does that EVERY year. Your honeymoon comes only one time (with that person at least). You should be prioritizing the honeymoon to a place that you BOTH choose. Op YTA big time.”
Not Ready To Get Married
“You are wrong. If you can’t figure out that you should include your fiancé in the honeymoon plans and that it should be something you decide together, then you’re not ready to get married.”
You Are A Jerk
“You are wrong. And so is your bonus Dad. He had the audacity of inviting your FIANCÉ to join the families on HER honeymoon lol.
Grow up. Or marry your family.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.