When a loved one passes away, it is natural to want to be there to support their family and friends. However, there are times when it may be difficult to attend a funeral, especially if it is far away or if you have financial constraints.
A user asked forum, Am I wrong for missing my father-in-law’s funeral after my mother-in-law booked my husband first class but my economy?
The Original Poster (OP) [a 23-year-old female] and her mother-in-law (MIL) did not share a close relationship. MIL was always civil towards OP but was a bit passive-aggressive at times, and they tend to disagree often.
They used to live in a different state. OP’s Father-in-law (FIL) passed away, and MIL told OP and her husband to attend the funeral. MIL booked their tickets to fly home.
When Did The Issue Arise
But the issue started when OP’s husband told her they couldn’t sit together on the plane because his mom (OP’s MIL) had booked him a first-class ticket while OP got economy.
What Did The Husband Say
OP was flabbergasted by this. OP tried asking him why, but he urged OP to leave it, and they’ll talk about it later.
What Happened Next
At that particular moment, OP felt humiliated. OP decided to not go to the funeral. OP’s husband was shocked by her decision and tried to convince OP to just go, but she declined.
What Happened Next?
He went alone, and OP ended up missing the funeral. He called OP and texted nasty things, calling her petty and spoiled. He said that OP should be grateful his mom paid for her ticket, to begin with, and that she doesn’t owe OP a Goddamn thing.
What Did OP Say
OP argued about how MIL could’ve booked them both in the economy if money was an issue, but he called OP pathetic for thinking about it when his dad had just died. He said it was cruel what she did and that his mom and family will never forget that she missed the funeral for ridiculous reasons.
OP asks, “Am I wrong for going home over this?”
You should Have Been There
You Are A Jerk
“You are a jerk. There are times in life when it is not about you. You made the conscious decision to be petty and skip out on your FIL’s funeral because you were angry your MIL did not purchase you a first-class ticket though she bought her son a first-class ticket.
Was that wrong of her? Yes. But that doesn’t even hold a candle to leaving your husband at the airport to fly out for his father’s funeral because you didn’t get the seat you wanted on the plane.
Honestly? This is the end of your relationship. It might not be today. It might not be this year. But this will be something your husband ALWAYS remembers. He will remember that his wife was too selfish to let go and sit a couple of hours in economy class and go to his father’s funeral with him. I
t doesn’t matter what you say or how you twist it. He will remember that you didn’t go with him because you didn’t like your airplane seat. Because you took a minor issue that could have been handled later, and you made it your hill to die on when your husband was grieving the loss of his Dad.
You Are Not Wrong
“Not a jerk – who buys a married couple plane tickets in different classes? She’s trying to drive a wedge between you, and your husband was fully on board. I don’t know how typical this is, but it seems symptomatic of deeper problems. Neither of them seems to have any respect for you at all.
I would’ve stayed home, too. It’s not like you could be the supportive wifey when you’re not even allowed to travel with him.”
Everyone Is A Jerk
“MIL for booking different tickets, your Husband for not trying to change his or your ticket and for telling you to suck it up and You for abandoning him and just skipping the funeral.
BTW you didn’t “miss” the funeral, you purposefully didn’t go. That title is misleading and sounds like you were too late because of your economy flight.”
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This article originally appeared on Mrs Daaku Studio.