Weddings are unique and personal celebrations, and we want to share them with the people we love most. Here is a story about one such unique wedding incident. An internet user shares her experience and asked, Am I a jerk for rushing home to get my sister’s forgotten wedding veil, but giving up on bringing it to her? We want you to share your views.


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OP’s oldest sister Odette just got married at a venue that (with no traffic) was about two hours and fifteen minutes away. Odette planned to wear great-great grandma Mary’s veil, which had a distinct lace pattern and was passed to only the eldest daughter. 

What Does OP Say

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OP says “In our family, it’s considered good luck, heavily sentimental, and we have multiple bridal pictures of eldest daughters in the veil while standing with their mom and grandma.”

What Happened On The Wedding Day?

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Before driving to the venue, the bridal party and family met at Odette’s house. The veil had been in a garment bag, hung up in front of a closet door, but the door had been opened, the hanger fell off, and none of them saw it when they packed up.

They made it to the venue by noon for the 4 pm wedding. Odette realized the veil was missing and ran to OP in a panic, insisting she needed to be the one to find it: mom wouldn’t drive fast enough, middle sister Constance was her maid of honor, and Dad was dealing with setup.

OP says “I didn’t think I could make it there and back, but Odette insisted and said that if needed we could stall the ceremony a little.”

Could OP Make It On Time?

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OP floored it but sat in bumper-to-bumper traffic for almost two hours, Waze estimating she wouldn’t be at her house until at least 2:45 pm. OP texted Odette that if she didn’t turn around *now*, she wouldn’t make it. Odette texted back, “JUST GET IT HERE.”

When OP emphasized that she wouldn’t make it for her wedding ceremony or reception if she didn’t turn around, she said “The photographer doesn’t leave until 7, just get it here before then so mom, grandma, and I can take pictures.” I

OP made it to her house on adrenaline, but it took her forever to find the veil and get on the road again.

Read: She CHOSE To Give More Money To Her Parents Than Her In-Laws. Her MIL Demands MORE For It To Be “Fair”. We Think She Shoudn’t, What’s Your Call?

What Did OP Say

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OP says, “Odette’s texts continued after the wedding ceremony and pictures. I was already exhausted, sitting in rush hour traffic, and upset that I’d missed the entire thing.

After re-reading our texts, they were all about Mary’s veil. I realized that she didn’t care about me being there, which upset me enough to turn around at 5:30pm, with an estimated arrival of 6:30pm and getting later.

I texted Odette that I was sorry, but the veil was put up, and the house key was in the flower pot. I woke up to a ton of angry texts from her accusing me of ruining her wedding and not trying hard enough to get back.” 

Is OP a jerk? Let’s go over a few comments on Reddit by other users. 

Sorry But Her Priorities Are Skewed 

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“When the absence of a veil ruins a wedding more than the absence of a family member, your priorities are skewed and you are owed nothing. Especially from the family member who wasn’t even missed.”

You Deserved Better

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“I’m getting golden child vibes here and I’m sorry you were treated this way. You deserve better from your sister at this moment. Please take space for yourself. Also, if the veil was so important it would’ve been with her dress. Just sayin”

How Could She Forget Something That Important?!

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“If something were that important to me, I would have driven everyone insane with my bazillion check-ins to ensure it was still set to get packed, AND I would never have let the car start before ensuring it was indeed with me.”

Read: Her Sister Had a “DRESS CODE” For All Women At Her Wedding. She Refused To Wear It. We Think She Is Right. You Decide


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“OP, You were assigned an impossible task. Your sister is misplacing her disappointment & blaming you for her own mistake. That must be incredibly upsetting. She can have pictures taken with the veil at a later date.”

Everything’s Pretty Much Messed Up Here

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“The veil is allowed only for eldest daughters to wear, and younger siblings don’t even have access to the sentimental family tradition. 

Younger sibling is expected to just be a servant for this special “grandmother, mother and daughter (all eldest daughter only)” exclusive and privileged family photo that a servant is not allowed to be in.

Eldest daughter doesn’t even care if the younger sibling misses attending the wedding ceremony and reception.”

Read: She DECIDES To SKIP OVER Her Boyfriend’s Brother’s Funeral Because Of Her Sister’s Wedding in a Few Weeks. Wants To Know If She Is Wrong?

Pictures Could’ve Been Recreated Some Other Day

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“I cannot imagine having my sibling miss my entire wedding for a veil, even if it is sentimental. She could have easily picked a day after the wedding to recreate some pictures with it, that’s what it would have been by the point you got there anyway since she didn’t have it all day. She shouldn’t have asked you to go in the first place.”

Everyone’s Being A Jerk

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“It was obvious you were going to miss the ceremony if you went for the veil so Odette was a jerk for asking you to do it and for not caring about your presence as much as the veil. But you shouldn’t agree and then bail. If you would have a hard line noped out of going, they could have browbeat some 17yo cousin with a lead foot to do it.”

She Might Try To Blame You AGAIN

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“Wow,  I’m so sorry you went through that. Don’t be surprised if she turns around and blames you for not getting the veil to her when her marriage falls apart. Please know that it won’t be your fault. It’ll be because she is a selfish and inconsiderate person.”

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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio

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