Husband and wife relationship is the most tricky one. You might not like something your partner does but does that mean you can can call them names?

A user asked, Am I wrong for parroting what my wife says to me back at her?


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It is the Original Poster’s (OP) 11th anniversary tonight. OP says, “Not sure it has any bearing on this story, but I think it’s essential to bring it up).”

What Happened At The Party

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They had a party at their place with some friends and neighbors, and toward the end of the party, OP was visibly intoxicated but decided to have another beer because that’s just what he does on a Friday night.

What Did The Wife Do

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Upon seeing OP retrieve this beer, OP’s wife says, “Ugh, another one, freaking really?” sounding all bent out of shape.

OP says, “This doesn’t bother me because I’ve been married to this super fly lady for 11 years.”

What Did OP Do

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About 4 minutes later, OP sees her getting a rice krisp treat, so he jokingly says, “Ugh, another one?” utterly free of profanities or anything, trying to show he is just messing around because that’s just OP’s personality.

What Did The Wife Do?

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OP says, “I’m now in the dog house, and she’s irritated because I was “making fun of her weight” and that “getting a dessert is different than sobriety.” I tried to explain that it was “not making fun of anyone’s weight, just parroting someone getting +1 of something,” but it has fallen upon deaf ears, and I have been jerk branded in our house.”

What Does OP Want To Know

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It should be noted that OP says he is not struggling with sobriety or any other such issues, he hears and sees things that make him laugh and wants to keep it going.

OP wants to know if he is a jerk for parroting his wife.

What Do Others Have To Say

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“You are a jerk. You were parroting her specifically to be a jerk.

You knew it was annoying and not remotely constructive. You say you want to keep doing things that make you laugh. So you enjoy being annoying and don’t care about others, making you a jerk. You’re fortunate your wife has put up with you for so long. Grow up and apologize.

Also, commenting on someone else’s eating differs from commenting on how much they drink.”

You Are A Jerk

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“You were already drunk and getting another beer, which sounds like a regular occurrence. Your wife could have said it in a better way. However, getting a treat is different from another beer when intoxicated.”

Your Wife Is Tolerating You

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“So many issues here. “Visibly intoxicated but had another beer anyway because that’s just what you do on a Friday night” How lovely for your wife to have to deal with your drunk, then hungover ass every weekend.

She’s fed up with that, giving her “another one, f*ing really?”

Eleven years of that is clear enough for this ‘super fly lady.’ Do you recognize when you’ve had enough alcohol and transition from humorously tipsy to obnoxious drunk? I’d say not, given your later remarks. Maybe you and your super-fly wife need to have a sober conversation about an agreed signal or word she can give that tells you when you’ve had enough alcohol for an evening if you can’t recognize it yourself.”

Passive-Aggressive Relationship

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“Not a jerk, and let the downvotes roll in. Commenting on his beer consumption is parenting and one-downing. It sounds petulant and passive-aggressive. Why all the misandry?

I feel this woman has a reason why you can not say something back to her, probably for everything. She should not have set the stage for ridiculing her husband’s choices. I don’t feel he was ridiculing her weight, just that he reflected back what she said. She made herself a victim after targeting, so she doesn’t get to get up on a cross simply because it was food.”

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