It’s perfectly fine to go out of your way to make your friend feel special. It’s not a competition, and you shouldn’t feel bad about making someone else happy, especially if they’re insecure.
The Original Poster (OP) took it to the forum, and asked “Am I wrong for purchasing my guy friend his dream birthday present and ‘outshining’ his girlfriend in the process?”. We want to know from you.
BACKSTORY
OP and Tom had been friends since college. They are in their mid 20’s now and are both in committed relationships. None of them ever had feelings for each other.
TOM IS A WATCH FANATIC
Since their college days, Tom had been a watch fanatic and OP knew that.
TOM’S DREAM WATCH
Recently Tom showed OP a stunning vintage watch and also made an off-handed comment about how he would die of joy if he somehow got his hands on one of those.
THE COINCIDENCE
OP was in New York a few weeks ago and stumbled upon a watch store that had the exact same watch that Tom wanted.
THE WATCH WAS EXPENSIVE
The watch was extremely expensive. It cost her around $2500. OP and her boyfriend are both financially strong, so she decided to get it for Tom’s 25th birthday.
TOM’S BIRTHDAY PARTY
Tom has a tradition of hosting a dinner party at his place, on his birthday, followed by cake-cutting and gift-opening.
WHAT DID OP SAY TO TOM
OP requested Tom to open her gift at last as it was a huge surprise for him. He agreed to do it.
WHAT DID HIS GIRLFRIEND GIFT HIM?
His girlfriend gifted him a hand-crocheted sweater and a book that Tom wanted for a long time. Her gifts were quite loving and thoughtful according to OP.
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
Finally, Tom opened OP’s gift and got very excited upon receiving his ‘dream watch’. He jumped in joy and gave OP a big hug. He also said that it was the best gift he ever received.
OP’S CONVERSATION WITH TOM’S GIRLFRIEND
The next morning, OP received a text from Tom’s girlfriend accusing her of deliberately giving him the watch that he wanted in order to outshine his girlfriend.
OP tried to make her understand that it was just a gesture she made to make her friend happy and that, as his girlfriend, she should be happy as well.
But She Was Angry
But his girlfriend said that happiness was just shared between Tom and OP and that she didn’t feel included and felt like OP ‘outshined’ her.
OP’s boyfriend told her that she should not apologize for someone else’s insecurities, but all of these have got her really confused!
Now, OP wants to know if what she did is right.
WHAT DO PEOPLE THINK?
“You weren’t thinking of how to hurt her, you just wanted a nice gift for your friend. Your BF is right, you don’t need to apologize for her insecurities.”, said one user.
She Was Out of Line
“I can empathize with how the girlfriend must have felt, but she was out of line to reach out to OP for what was just a kind gesture.”, said another user.
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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.