Once Rachel Green from the TV Show, FRIENDS said, “No Uterus, no opinion”. We think it holds true to date!
An internet user asked, “Am I a jerk for telling my dad he doesn’t get to talk about my period?”. Here’s the full story for your context
Backstory
The Original Poster (OP) (16f) has made it really awkward to be around her dad (46m) and has probably ruined her relationship with him.
“I know I’m kind of young to be on social media but I need help. I’m currently on my period and only use pads because tampons make me uncomfortable.”, says OP.
When The Family Gets A Dog
In January, OP’s family got a dog. OP is not really a fan of dogs but she tolerates her. When OP replaces a pad, she wraps it up in toilet paper or wraps it in the wrapper of the new pad and seals it closed with the little tape still on the wrapper.
This has never been a problem until they got a dog. The dog likes going into the bathroom and taking OP’s used pads out of the trash and ripping them apart.
What Does OP Say
“For the last couple of months, I’ve had to chase her around the house and clean up ripped-apart pads, but it’s never really bothered the rest of my family as long as I’m the one cleaning them up.”, said OP.
What Happened Today
Today, the dog got to a pad OP had thrown away earlier this morning. OP caught her threw the pad back in the trash and closed the bathroom door so she couldn’t get to the trash again.
While OP was in her bedroom, OP’s dad confronted her about it. He told OP that the dog kept getting OP’s pads out of the trash and that it was a problem.
Dad’s Problematic Advice
OP was confused and asked him what he wanted her to do about it since the only way to dispose of a pad was to throw it away. He told OP that he wanted OP to “grow the hell up and start using tampons.” OP was horrified.
OP told him that she wasn’t comfortable with tampons and that he didn’t get to talk to OP about her period. He asked why not. OP was speechless and had no idea what to say and just started crying from the embarrassment and shock and shut her bedroom door.
What Did OP Do Next
OP’s mom (47f) is currently in Florida visiting family but she was her last resort. OP has copied and pasted the exact message she sent her mom:
“Tell Dad to stay in his own lane and leave me alone because he just told me I had to grow up and start using tampons’ so that the dog would stop eating my pads. He doesn’t get to say that to me, it’s not fair.
I can’t help that my uterus sheds every month and I go through almost unbearable pain and his only remark is that I have to grow up and use something I’m not comfortable with.”
The Aftermath
OP knows it sounds a bit bratty, but she was crying her eyes out and had no idea what to say. Her mom is furious with him. She texted back saying it was inappropriate that he said that to OP and that it was a total jerk move on his part and it wouldn’t happen again.
“I have no idea what she texted him but I haven’t seen or talked to him since. I think he’s probably mad at me for bringing my mom into this and I don’t know how to confront him. Am I a jerk?”, asks OP.
It’s Not About Growing Up!
“Not the jerk. I’m a woman in my 40’s and I still use pads – if I ‘grow up’ any more I’ll be legit dead. My son’s girlfriend put a pad in the trash and I got up one morning and the dog had gotten it out.
You know what I did? Threw it out before she noticed and got a goddamned trash bin with a lid for that bathroom. You know what I didn’t do? Blame a young person because I didn’t think ahead and do that in the first place.”
What The Hell Is Your Dad’s Problem?
“Not the jerk. What the hell is your dad’s problem? I’m a man with no knowledge of this stuff, but why on earth would switching to tampons change this?
I’d tell your dad to grow up and teach his dog not to go through the trash. Maybe speak to your mom (since your dad sounds super unreasonable) about buying new bathroom garbage that would be harder for the dog to get into.”
It’s None Of His Business!
“Don’t tampons get disposed of the same way? So, how would that help? Also, it’s none of his business, very inappropriate. Not the jerk!”
Your Dad Is Out Of Line
“Your dad is out of line. There is nothing immature about using pads. Lots of older women prefer them over tampons.
However, this could literally be solved by getting one of those bathroom bins with the lids that clip on. No one wants to see a bloody pad being ripped up in communal areas by the dog.”
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