One should always respect their partner and help them in every way possible. Doing household work isn’t just the responsibility of one person. Partners should do the work together so that the workload gets divided.
The Original Poster (OP) took it to the forum, and asked “Am I wrong for making my fiance storm out of the house because he said my job is easy?”. We want to know from you.
BACKSTORY
OP is a part-time housekeeper. She also goes to night school to finish her degree. Her fiance, Kenny is a mechanic.
WHEN DID THE PROBLEM START BETWEEN THEM?
The problem between them started very recently.
WHAT IS THE PROBLEM?
OP had been asking Kenny to help her with the household chores. But every time she would ask for his cooperation, Kenny would say that he was tired after dealing with cars the entire day.
BOTH THE JOBS ARE PHYSICALLY DEMANDING
Working as a mechanic is exhausting and tiring, but so is working as a housekeeper. OP cleans houses during the day and attends her classes during the evening.
Also, they are planning their wedding, so she has been working extra hard.
WHAT DOES KENNY THINK OF OP’S JOB
Kenny thinks OP’s job isn’t hard at all. He always says that OP is just weak and lazy and that she always complains about cleaning houses.
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
One day OP asked Kenny if he could clean the kitchen because she had an immense workload and her exams were approaching as well.
WHAT WAS KENNY’S RESPONSE?
Kenny refused to do it, because he thinks that he works more than OP. He also told OP that she should do all the household work as she is a housekeeper, just like Kenny would repair their car if it broke down, as he’s a mechanic.
WHAT DID OP DO?
OP then tried explaining to Kenny how physically demanding her job is. She said that housekeepers make a house livable, and it takes hours to do so.
She also said that people are underappreciated for this job, even though it is physically and emotionally draining.
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
The fight escalated, and Kenny ended up saying “I don’t see why you have a problem. My mom had seven kids and still had a squeaky clean house. You, on the other hand, are making excuses. It’s not like your job is hard.
It’s just cleaning houses. If you can do it in other places, why not here. Try working as a mechanic.”. After this, OP told Kenny that she needs space and Kenny stormed out of the house. They haven’t spoken ever since.
Now, OP wants to know from the forum if what she did is right.
WHAT DO PEOPLE THINK?
“If you had broken bicycles at home every single day then his argument would make more sense. House chores are something that needs to be done all the time. It’s a humongous amount of invisible unappreciated work.
For some reason mostly women are expected to do it. I’m not a housekeeper but an IT specialist and I’m still doing more chores at home and getting into arguments over it. Your partner is lazy and doesn’t appreciate your work. Stand your ground.”, said one user.
Do Not Marry This Man
“Do not marry this man (at least, not unless he demonstrates real readiness to change). He refuses to acknowledge the work you do inside or outside your home and suggests that his mother is a model: do you WANT to raise children with a man who doesn’t think any of this is ‘real’ work?”, said another user.
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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.