Parenting can be hard, especially when the other parent of your children is your ex.
The Original Poster (OP) took it to the forum, and asked “Am I wrong for showing my kids a spreadsheet of everything I pay for, and showing that their dad doesn’t do much for them?”. We want to hear from you.
BACKSTORY
OP has two kids, 13 and 11, with her ex.
THEIR LIFESTYLE
They live a pretty frugal life. the extra money OP makes goes into their college accounts or fun weekends.
THEIR RELATIONSHIP WITH THEIR DAD
Their dad has them once a month and is basically the “fun parent.”
THEIR DAD’S NATURE
Their dad fails to pay the child support payments often but makes sure to arrange surprise trips for the kids once in a while.
THE NEGATIVE NARRATIVE
OP never says anything bad to the kids about their dad. But, the dad has been pushing the narrative that without him and the money he gives to OP, they wouldn’t have the home.
IS IT TRUE?
The narrative is definitely not true but the kids started believing it.
WHAT WAS THE LAST STRAW?
OP’s last straw was when the kids told her that it is dad who pays for the house.
WHAT DID OP DO?
OP pulled up her budget spreadsheet that included everything that her ex pays for. It clearly showed that he didn’t pay child support for the past 2 months.
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
The kids got really upset for being lied to. The oldest kid even got into a fight with her dad when she called him to confirm the facts.
This led to an argument between OP and her ex. OP’s friends also have different opinions on this situation. Now, OP wants to know from the forum if what she did was wrong.
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
“Your ex attacked. You were defending yourself. So no, you are not wrong.”, said one user.
YOU TOLD THEM THE TRUTH
“If you would have gone on to attack and said nasty things about her ex, it would be a little grayer – but all you did was give the kids a basic, factual account of their budget breakdown so they understood the financial situation and allowed them to form their own thoughts about the subject.”, said another user.
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