A girlfriend is upset with her boyfriend because he gave her a gift she didn’t like. She feels that he didn’t put any thought into it and that he doesn’t know her. This has caused a rift in their relationship, and they are now trying to figure out how to move forward.
A user asked the forum, Am I a jerk for “implying” that my boyfriend is cheap because of the V-day gift he got me?
BACK STORY
The original poster (OP) has been with her boyfriend, who has been a single dad to 2 boys for two years. OP has a decent job with a decent income, and he is into woodworking as a hobby.
OP says that For V days, Bdays, and every other celebration, her boyfriend gifts her mostly jewelry, and OP gets him his favorite gadgets or sports gear.
THE GIFT
OP says that For that Valentine, she got him sneakers, and OP found out today that his gift for her was a wooden framed photo of him, OP, and the kids.
OP says she wasn’t thrilled with it. When OP told her boyfriend her honest opinion that she didn’t want to open her mouth but her boyfriend pushed her to say it.
HE COULDN’T BELIEVE IT
OP’s boyfriend said that he couldn’t believe that was OP’s reaction, but OP pointed out that he has money for a $200 necklace at least so that she could wear it at the engagement party.
WHAT DID HE SAY
OP’s boyfriend said OP was out of line to imply that he was being cheap when all he did was make her a special gift and also had the kids help with it and put so much thought and effort into it because they see OP as family and her boyfriend thinks that OP should be appreciative of that.
SHE EXPECTED A GREAT COMBO
OP said she appreciated it but still thinks he could’ve added the necklace as a great combo. OP says that her boyfriend got even madder, saying he couldn’t understand why OP valued a necklace as much as or even over a special gift he and the kids made for her.
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT
OP says that they went back and forth on this, and their breakfast got ruined. He says that he went upstairs and refused to speak to OP.
OP feels like her boyfriend blew this out of proportion since he asked for my opinion, and OP doesn’t know if he has the right to be upset with her.
HE MADE EFFORTS
“I’m assuming he made the frame, which takes a lot of time and effort … every minute of the project, he would be thinking of you … Then he found a photo of him and his kids and you.
He is literally presenting you with an image of you as part of his family, and you’re complaining as it’s not worth a lot.
Do you know the min value of the wood? Then add that to his time.
Entitled much?”
IT IS A CLEAR SYMBOL OF LOVE AD ACCEPTANCE
“Forget the value of the wood and labor — why isn’t it worth more that he and the kids made this for her and that it’s a clear symbol of love and acceptance into their family? What could be worth more than that? Their beautiful gesture is clearly wasted on this materialistic, ungrateful woman.
Yeah, OP, you are the jerk. Get over yourself and appreciate what you’ve got with these people before you lose them. All the expensive shiny jewelry in the world won’t buy you love and family.”
YOU VALUE MONEY MORE
“his gift is awesome and amazing. The fact that you’re upset because of the dollar value is sad. There are things in life that are more important than money. Those three people in that picture and who made that frame are more valuable than a necklace.”
IT IS A SENTIMENTAL GIFT
“I didn’t even finish reading after ‘money for a $200 necklace’ You are the jerk, no question about it. He chose to give you a sentimental gift, and you messed all over it.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.