Balancing personal obligations with supporting loved ones during a crisis can be delicate and challenging.
A user took to the forum and asked, “Am I wrong for not taking my wife’s miscarriage seriously?”
Backstory:
The Original Poster’s (OP) spouse, a 28-year-old woman, is six weeks pregnant with their second child. The couple had their first child three years ago, and they could conceive after only one month of trying without complications.
How Was The Second Pregnancy
The second pregnancy has also been without issues related to conceiving, as she became pregnant in less than two months after they stopped using protection.
OP Received A Call
OP received a call from his 28-year-old wife experiencing bleeding. She was very distressed, and OP attempted to reassure her by suggesting she should not worry too much. He advised her to contact the doctor’s office and to take that easy.
What Did He Tell Her
He told her “If it’s a miscarriage, then it’s a miscarriage”
What Did OP Remind Her Of
OP reminded her that it is natural to have a miscarriage before the 12th week of pregnancy and that they did not have any issues with conceiving. He also stated that if they were unlucky this time, they could try again. However, his wife was not pleased with his reaction and ended the call abruptly.
What Was OP Doing
OP was in the process of studying for the bar exam, which was scheduled for later that week and decided to continue. He devoted most of that week to learning with their study group.
What Happened Next?
After picking up his daughter from daycare, OP returned home at the end of the day. OP’s wife expressed anger towards OP for not taking her potential miscarriage seriously enough.
What Did Op Do
OP apologized to her wife and acknowledged that it was challenging to go through a potential miscarriage. However, OP’s wife refused to accept his attempts at comfort and claimed that OP did not care.
OP reassured his wife that he cared about the situation but was also experiencing stress due to the upcoming bar exam. OP reminded his wife that miscarriages could be natural, and he does not anticipate having trouble conceiving in the future.
Although the situation made OP feel sad, OP acknowledged the reality of the problem and was also dealing with other stressful obligations. OP wanted to comfort his wife as much as possible, but his spouse was not receptive to his attempts at support.
It’s Sad
“Wow, it’s perfectly natural to die, too, but some people get upset about that.”
You Are A Jerk
“You are a jerk, your wife had your baby growing inside her, worried it was going to not survive. Miscarriages are so, so traumatising. And your reaction is “we will just make another one it’s fine” GROSS
You Are Hateful
“Whoever raised this little man must have been such a hateful person. He was clearly not raised with even an ounce of empathy. How very sad for all.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.