A user asked the forum, am I a jerk for telling my wife that she can stay home this Thanksgiving?
BACK STORY
The Original Poster’s (OP) wife is a grade-A+ picky eater. He says it’s bothersome to a certain degree, but the drama begins on holidays.
ARGUMENTS
She’d refuse to eat certain meals, and mom would take it personally, resulting in a series of arguments between them. OP says as a compromise this year, his wife offered to bring her food to Thanksgiving dinner.
HIS MOM WOULD REACT
He was stunned. He asked if she thought this through, and she looked at him confused.
He told her how weird it’d be for her to bring food, especially when she wouldn’t share it with anybody else, and to think about how his mom would react.
SHE WAS UPSET
But OP’s wife got very offended and upset. She said it was not her problem and she was just trying to make it work by bringing her own meal.
He told her again that his mom might not like or even allow this.
SHE DOESN’T WANT TO EAT FOOD THAT SHE DOESN’T LIKE
She blew up at him, asking if I wanted her to either eat food she didn’t like or go hungry.
He suggested that she give his mom’s food a chance, but she said it wasn’t about his mom’s cooking; she doesn’t like a certain food.
HE TOLD HER TO STAY AT HOME
They argued, and he asked her to stay home this Thanksgiving and have whatever meal she liked. OP says she got quiet and then lashed out at him, calling me insensitive and negative to say this to her.
SHE COULDN’T STOP RANTING
He repeatedly asked her to calm down, but she couldn’t stop ranting about how OP was basically willing to exclude her from a major event.
HE FELT GUILTY
She started cold-shouldering him about it while at the same time guilting him, saying that he was treating her poorly after she offered the perfect compromise of carrying her own food.
He wants to know if he is wrong
SHE IS TRYING TO COMPROMISE
“She offered a compromise. My wife’s family does the feast of the seven fishes. I hate fish. So since I joined the family, it’s the feast of the seven fishes and a chicken. We all get a good laugh, and my MIL is happy to make it for me.”
YOU MUST STAND UP FOR YOUR WIFE
“You are a jerk for not standing up for your wife. She’s trying hard to make holidays work with your family, but you only care about your Mommy’s feelings.
If your mother is so thin-skinned that she can’t handle the idea that people have different dietary needs, she doesn’t get to host parties.”
NOTHING IS WRONG
“Your wife is doing exactly what those with food allergies do. Bring their food. There is nothing wrong with that at all. Your mom needs to not be so easily offended by your wife’s food preferences.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.