A user shares a catch-22 situation: My husband lost his 80k a year job, wants me to quit school, and I’m two semesters away from getting my degree. Should I quit? We want to hear from you.
The Original Poster’s (OP) husband quit his 80k-a-year job because he was in over his head and quit without another job lined up. He has turned it around on OP that she needs to get a job and quit school.
What Is OP Trying To Do?
OP is studying MIS/data analytics and has a software engineering internship at a Fortune 20 company this summer. She worked 30 hours a week on top of her demanding school schedule.
She Also Lives Far From the Campus
She also lives far from campus and commutes 1 hr 45 minutes one way to and from school, taking the train and bus. Luckily work and school is at the same place. They only had one car between them because he needed his car for work.
What Is Their Financial Situation Like?
When it rains, it pours. The car broke down; OP took it to a mechanic; he said it was not worth the money to repair and get a new car. OP’s tooth broke. She has insurance, but the state of my teeth needs other work done and will cost at least $3k.
OP’s husband says her being in school has put us in a financial hole.
Why Does OP Not Think so?
OP gets 1/2 my tuition paid to be a campus employee. The other half is through scholarships and her paychecks. She refuses to take out student loans. She pays all her school expenses. He takes care of living expenses. Luckily his uncle gave us a windfall through an inheritance of 30k. Not much in CA.
10k of that went towards OP’s husband’s debts he had to pay immediately. That left them with only 20k. They need a new car they don’t have money for. That 20k is not going to last because of living expenses.
What Does OP Feel
OP says, “He’s acting like I’m majoring in interpretive dance. This is why I went back to school to earn more so we no longer have to worry about finances. He has a problem holding a job. He either gets fired or quits. I’m tired of the instability. I plan to become a data engineer, and I’m two semesters away.
In the meantime, I don’t see him trying to look for another job. I had to quit my job to work this internship, the only revenue stream coming in. But he wants me to quit school and work full time. If I quit school, I can’t work this internship. I can’t get a lucrative full-time job if I don’t finish my degree.
Catch 22. OP wants help and options.
What others have to say:
Do Not Quit
“Do not under any circumstances quit school or your internship. Tough it out no matter what. You’ve invested so much that quitting or pausing now would be foolish. Have you heard the phrase crabs in a bucket? He’s dragging you down.”
It is NOT a Catch 22
“This isn’t a Catch-22. It’s a no-brainer. Finish school, get the job once finished, and don’t let anyone take you down with them.”
“Do not, under any circumstances, quit school! You are so close to graduating. He needs to get his act together and wake up! You’re focused, and he’s playing games but blaming you.”
He Is Pulling You Down
“He’s trying to pull you down because he knows he messed up.
Do not quit. I know you don’t want student loans, but maybe taking out $5k to buy a cheap cash car to commute to work while your partner gets a job is the best bet.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.