A user asked the forum, Am I a jerk for buying my brother a present off his wedding registry rather than helping at the wedding?
BACK STORY
The original poster ( OP ) is a photographer. Mostly OP does industrial photography. If you have ever seen a brochure for a company, you understand the kind of work he does.
He says he has taken more pictures of warehouses, bulldozers, building sites, and work crews than you can imagine.
WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHY AS A HOBBY
OP also does wedding photos on the side. Whenever his friends and family ask him to do their pictures, he offers them at a steep discount.
So far, everyone has taken him up on it. OP says there is no way they would pay less than three times what he offered to do the wedding if they went with another professional photographer.
ISSUES
OP says that it became an issue twice. One objected to him for wanting to be paid. They returned and apologized when they shopped around and saw the real price.
The other chose to get her neighbor’s son, who was good with his camera, to take the pictures. OP brought his camera but not all my equipment to that wedding and enjoyed taking pictures as a guest.
GIFTING AT ANNIVERSARY
He gave them an album of his pictures for their first anniversary, and they were insanely thankful.
They never said anything to him because they were embarrassed, but the kid messed up.
THE PROBLEM BEGINS
So the issue is OP’s brother asked him to take pictures at his wedding. OP agreed and quoted him a price. But his brother said that he should do it as a wedding gift.
He said the price was his wedding gift
EXPECTING A GIFT
OP’s brother said his fiancee also expected OP to get them a gift off the registry.
OP refused and said he would be more than happy to attend as a guest and got on his phone in front of him and got a gift from their registry.
GOT A GIFT
He said since he had now purchased a gift, he would not be taking pictures.
HIS BROTHER CALLS HIM A JERK
Also, OP said he would still bring his camera because he likes taking pictures.
OP’s brother said that OP is a jerk and cheap since it doesn’t cost him anything to take pictures, and he shouldn’t try and make money off it. OP told him that he needed his bathroom remodel done, and he wanted it done at the cost of materials since his brother is a contractor, and it will cost him nothing in labor if he does all the work himself.
Their parents are staying out of it because they know OP has always been paid for taking pictures.
Only his brother and the bride’s side of the family think OP was wrong.
YOUR BROTHER IS DEMANDING
“Why would you need to get them a gift and gift them the wedding photos? Your brother sounds demanding.
I would probably skip the games and not even bring the camera for the wedding.”
THAT’S A FAIR TRADE
“I think that’s a fair trade. You do photos for free, and he does remodeling for free.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.