When someone offers to help you, respecting their time and energy is important. Otherwise, problems may arise. A user asked the forum, “Am I a jerk for going home without my boyfriend because he wouldn’t stop having conversations ?”
The Original Poster (OP) (24F) and her boyfriend were invited to one of their friend’s birthday party the previous day.
She said she had work early today, so they agreed to leave early. Also, her boyfriend broke his foot, so she was in charge of driving.
SHE STARTED GETTING TIRED
Around 11 pm, she started to feel tired, so she told her boyfriend they would return home soon. Her boyfriend said yes, and asked her to let him finish his conversation and she agreed.
WHAT DID SHE DO NEXT?
After 5 minutes of waiting, she told him again that she was tired, so they needed to leave. Her boyfriend told her to wait five more minutes.
HE KEPT TALKING
She says those 5 minutes quickly turned 10, those 10 into 20, and 20 into 30 minutes.
At this point, she was getting angry because he already promised her they would leave early, but it was close to midnight, and he was still talking.
SHE ASKED HIS SISTER TO DRIVE HER BOYFRIEND HOME
OP went to him again and told him that if he was having fun and wanted to stay, she could ask his sister to drive him home as it was on her way.
Her boyfriend refused and said that he was coming.
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
She told him she was tired and would leave without him if he wasn’t there in 5 minutes. He said he’d be there. She says without surprise that after 5 minutes, he was still not there but was having another conversation with someone else.
SHE TOLD HIM THAT SHE WAS LEAVING
She went to him one last time and told him she was leaving. She guessed he didn’t hear because he didn’t react.
HIS SISTER AGREED TO DROP HIM
Before leaving, she asked his sister if she could drive him home. His sister said she would, so she thanked her and left.
HER BOYFRIEND CALLED HER
Her boyfriend called her 10 minutes later to ask where she was. She told him she left because she was tired and he wouldn’t leave.
He called her a jerk and hung up.
She says he texted right after and told her that she was a jerk for leaving without him, that he was just talking with his friends, and that it wouldn’t have killed her to wait a little longer. She says he blocked her immediately and slept at his sister’s house.
WHAT DID OP DO NEXT?
She texted her boyfriend’s sister to ask about him. She told her he just needed time to cool down and that leaving without him had hurt him.
She says there has been no news from him or his sister. She asks if she is a jerk to leave without her boyfriend.
HE IS SELFISH AND DISRESPECTFUL
“You were very clear and reasonable with your boyfriend about your need to leave early. He was disrespectful and selfish by ignoring you and continuing to talk with his friends.
He also broke his promise to you and lied about coming soon. You did nothing wrong by leaving without him, especially since you arranged for his sister to drive him home. He owes you an apology.”
HE HAD NO INTENTION OF LEAVING EARLY
“The real giveaway is “that it wouldn’t have killed you to wait a little more.” He had no intention of leaving early and was just lying to you to keep you quiet.”
HE IS A RED FLAG
“Let him leave you blocked and move on. You don’t want to continue a relationship with someone like this. Red flags are everywhere.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.