Love is wonderful, but when a relationship starts feeling bad, it’s a good idea to wait and see if things can get better.
The Original Poster (OP) took it to the forum, and asked “Am I wrong for moving my girlfriend back in against my kid’s and therapist’s wishes?”. We want to know from you.
OP is a widower and he has two kids. His wife died two years back.
OP’S PRESENT GIRLFRIEND
OP’s current girlfriend moved in with them last year. She is a beautiful and intelligent girl. According to OP, she is creative and passionate in ways that his dead wife never was.
SHE IS TROUBLED
Although she is smart, intelligent, beautiful, and passionate, she is also quite troubled. She is highly reactive to the thought of abandonment.
No matter how much love she receives from OP, she has a tendency of twisting OP’s words and actions into something sinister, and then she reacts to it.
HER ISSUE WITH JOBS
She is smart and intelligent, which is why she easily lands a lot of jobs. But she fails to keep each and every one of them because of her past traumas. She quits all her jobs after two weeks because she feels like she is being followed by someone.
This paranoia had resulted in her ending up in court because she had confronted innocent people accusing them of following her.
She gets paranoid at the slightest of things and starts yelling, calling friends, and badmouthing OP. OP has lost a few friends over her behavior as well. There have been instances where she would show up but refuse to talk to anybody because she felt rejected by something.
WHAT DID SHE DO TO A MUTUAL FRIEND?
Recently, she started doubting OP of seeing another woman who is their mutual friend. In spite of making her understand, she refused to believe and ended up leaving negative reviews on that friend’s business.
OP’s girlfriend also obsessively searches every bag in the house for trackers and dumps out groceries because she fears tampering.
OP decided to put his girlfriend in therapy. She just got out of a voluntary in-patient program. The family therapist approved of OP’s decision to rent a condo while she continued therapy. The condo has 24/7 security, and OP visits her often.
OP MOVED HIS GIRLFRIEND BACK IN
In spite of everything she had done, OP missed her, and so he decided to move her back in without discussing it with his kids. He moved all her stuff back in while the kids weren’t at home.
Finally, when the kids returned, they couldn’t believe their eyes and lashed out at OP. They said that even though she means well, there are certain things she did that are unforgivable.
Now OP wants to know if this is wrong?
WHAT DO PEOPLE THINK?
“The fact that he waited until the kids were out to move her back implies he knew they were not on board with this and still did it. And it is going to cost you your relationship with your kids.”, said one user.
“What’s crazy to me is he doesn’t seem to care if she’s mentally ill or something else, he just wants her regardless and I wouldn’t imagine the best thing would be a mentally ill person receiving conflicting treatment from all parties involved like why is he going against the therapist and family when they obviously agree on the point.”, said another user.
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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.