Becoming a teenager is a time of transition and growth, marked by increasing independence and responsibility. Teenagers learn to manage their own lives, make their own decisions, and rely on themselves in new ways.
But, what happens when you feel the “trusted” adults are not supportive? An 18-year-old teen took to the forum and asked, “Am I wrong for refusing to get a job and pay rent at my parent’s house?”
We want you to tell us what you think.
Here Is The Backstory:
The Original Poster (OP) turned 18 years old 3 days ago. On his birthday, OP’s stepdad told him to start paying rent to “live in his house.” OP mentions that his stepdad is entirely Christian and conservative.
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OP Says He Doesn’t Expect To Be Rent Free
The OP says he doesn’t expect to live rent-free forever, but he knows that his stepdad is coming from a spiteful place.
OP’s stepdad and mom have 2 kids in 9 years of marriage. The OP is not a biological son to the stepdad and is a clear reminder that his wife was divorced and not a virgin when they married.
What Else Does He Say
He adds, “I’m being treated like a guest, and my mom is allowing it because she thinks highly of him. He doesn’t need my money to pay rent, plus I don’t have much, and he wants £100 per month. We still have lots of time for this, but I bet his kids won’t pay rent while they’re in school.”
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Original Poster’s Intentions and What Happened?
OP’s A-level (U.K.) exams start mid-April and last until July. He is doing STEM subjects and hoping to fulfill his offer for a medicine course at a good university.
He also adds that he is aiming for a straight A, which will require a lot of studying, and if he gets a job, it will be challenging to maintain that level of study.
OP Says He Is Moving Out
The OP says he is moving out in September to attend university, and the student loan is 100% his responsibility. His parents won’t be financing anything.
What Else Does He Say
He says, “it honestly just feels vindictive, and it’s not like I’m unproductive.
I’m trying to save the money I had left from my last job for when I move out, and paying my stepdad £800 when he doesn’t need it feels spiteful and like he’s punishing me and making my life harder for being born.”
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What Original Poster Decides To Do?
OP’s aunt (mom’s sister) isn’t fond of his stepdad, told he’s being ridiculous, and asked him to live with her instead. Aunt’s home is an hour away, but the OP’s school is in the middle.
She offered the guest room for free, so I could save money for his university. The OP took up the offer as it benefits him.
OP’s Mother Keep Crying
The OP’s mother keeps crying that I am leaving; hence, his stepdad is annoyed. The stepdad and the OP got into an argument where the former clarified that he’s like a tenant to prepare me for the real world.
The OP asked, “do tenants not have the right to leave?” which annoyed him further. My stepdad says I’m hurting my mother and taking resources from my aunt because I’m “too entitled” to pay rent. This is just what’s best for me. I said I’d visit. Am I in the wrong?”
You Did Right
“Not wrong. Actions, meet consequences. Your stepdad tried to flex on you…and his powerplay backfired.
Your mother may be crying, but she LET HIM DO IT. That house is half hers, and so is the decision to charge you rent. She is not blameless here.
Your aunt’s “resources” are none of your stepdad’s business.”
He Is Intolerable
“He was probably going to try and kick you out or slowly make it intolerable for you to live there anyway, so good on you for beating him to it and getting out on your terms. Glad your aunt is awesome, good luck on your exams!”
It Shouldn’t Happen
“All of this. Not wrong.
You are a dependent child, still in school, getting straight As and going to post-secondary in the fall. Your stepfather wanted to steal your money and still crow about how generous he is to let you keep living there.
Props to your aunt. Good luck on your A levels, OP. I am certain you’ll crush them.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.