Some pickup lines are so bad, they’re unforgettable. An internet user asked, What is the worst pickup line you’ve ever heard? And we were baffled by the responses!
Being Extremely Direct
“A guy came up to a colleague and told her, “Hey hottie, can I sleep with you” Just like that, out of the blue.” Said one.
“The direct approach. Works 0.002% of the time, every time.” Another added.
“One time I was in a bar with my (admittedly stunning) friend and some guy was like “hey can I buy you a drink? Must be hard being out with a friend that’s so much better looking than you.”
Obviously didn’t work, told him to go”
The Virginity Triggers
“Hey, baby. I know you don’t have your virginity anymore, but can I play with the box it came in?”
The Brutal Approach
“Did you fall from heaven? Because your face is really messed up up.” Said one.
“Did it hurt? When you clawed your way up from hell?” Another added.
“A guy told me he just started a new apprenticeship as a plumber helper and asked me “would you like to watch me install a toilet?”
The Pants Joke
Sitting at a bar, and a girl I was on a date with was approached by another man who said:
“Your pants look very empty without me in them.”
I had offered to give her my pants so that this guy could be in her pants. She laughed and we left the bar.
P.S. Thanks, random drunk guy, I went to 3rd base that night because of you.
Sandwich Hotty Or Hottie Sandwich?
“When I was in college, there was one liquor store in the area that wouldn’t ID, but barely anyone ever went there, wasn’t sure why. Anyways, I go there, get a bottle and in front of me was a girl from the college.
She gets rung out, and I grab my bottle, and as I’m walking out the door, this fat homeless guy looks up at her and yells
“Damn girl you look so good I just wanna chop you up and put you in my sandwich”
And makes a WHRLLBRGH noise as he showcases how he would approach this metaphorical hottie sandwich. Never seen someone run that fast to their car lmao.”
The Flowery Context
“I was 15 at the mall (1990s) with a few friends and wearing a shirt with flowers on it. Some guy walked up and asked, “How many seeds did it take to germinate your shirt?” I have no poker face and was extremely confused by the comment. He quickly said, “Terrible pick-up line. I know.” I blurted out, “that was a pickup line?!” I wasn’t trying to be mean.
It really popped out of my mouth. He sort of shrugged and walked away. Very PG compared to the other ones on here, but terrible nonetheless.”
The Not-So-Creepy Summer Romance
“On a very hot summer day, a van stopped and this pudgy metalhead rolled down his window and said: “I got an air conditioner in the back. What do you think, you and me?” It wasn’t threatening in the slightest. Just an honest and very direct question. I replied, “Ahhh I think not!” He said “Alright,” smiled and went on his way. I’m still impressed by the way he made it sound so not creepy.”
The Appendix Reference
“Someone messaged me on a dating app saying “I’m like your appendix – I want to burst inside you”.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.