Having boundaries and expectation is one thing, but going passive-aggressive is another. A user asked, Am I wrong for using my dishwasher as a storage space and still expecting my partner to do dishes?
We want to hear from you. Here is the entire story:
The Original Poster (OP) is a little neurotic and doesn’t think dishwashers are suitable for dishes. OP says “I also don’t trust my partner to not put any of my nice kitchen stuff in the dishwasher that should be hand washed while I’m gone.”
What Did OP Say
OP’s partner told her before they moved in together that in the house, he wants to be able to use the dishwasher; otherwise, he won’t do any dishes.
What Happened Next?
They move in together, and OP ends up using the dishwasher to store shaker bottles and plastic items, and for the past several months, have been washing all of his dishes by hand.
What Does OP Say
OP says, “I’m so tired of it, though and believe he can wash a few dishes every now and then to help me out. He points out that he already told me if he can’t use the dishwasher, he’s not doing any dishes, but washing a dish by hand doesn’t take long. I’m getting frustrated, and I’m not sure who is in the wrong.”
OP asks if she is wrong,
What Did Others Have To Say?
Another added, “You are wrong because we all know the real reason you are using the dishwasher as storage space and it’s not for lack of storage; it’s to passive-aggressively prevent its use.
What’s Going To Affect Relationship
That’s not an open line of communication. That’s driving a literal wedge into something your partner wants to do. A lasting relationship is a series of compromises, and you’re giving none of that energy.“
What Do You Think
What do you think? Is it appropriate for OP to use the dishwasher as storage? Is is right for OP’s partner to refuse to wash dishes by hand? What do you think?
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This originally appeared on Mrs. Daaku Studio.