In this story, a mother thinks about asking her young daughter to pay “rent” to help with household expenses, and people wonder if it’s a fair idea.
A user asked, Am I wrong for charging my daughter “rent”? Read the complete story to know who is wrong here.
Backstory
The Original Poster (OP) has a daughter who is 16 years old. She recently got a job as a cashier about two months ago. She’s still in high school and only works a few days a week.
What Did OP and OP’s Husband Do?
Yesterday, OP’s husband and OP talked to her about contributing to the household with part of her check.
Both of us had to pay around her age as children, and we gave her a couple of months to settle into the job before bringing it up, so they thought it would be okay.
OP Called The Charge “Rent”
OP called the charge “rent” in her title because she didn’t know what else to say, but that’s not really what it is.
What Does OP Say
OP says, “I’m not going to kick my daughter out of the house if she stops paying (obviously!) I just genuinely need help. My family isn’t in a good financial situation, and getting extra cash from her helps me afford my rent and food for my children.
I have another child besides her, who isn’t working yet. I do need the help.”
What Is The Charge Like?
The charge is only $40/check or $80/month. This means paying for her music subscription and the gas OP uses driving her to and from work, maybe slightly more. Each check for her is around $200-220.
What Did The Daughter Say?
She told OP, OP was being unfair because she’s a minor and needs to be able to save her money.
But OP is still leaving her the majority of her paycheck to save or do whatever she wants, and all OP is making up for is the extra gas money OP has to spend now that OP drives her to work.
What Does OP Say
OP also says, “I didn’t call this “rent” to her face. I told my daughter I needed help affording the gas I use when I drive her to and from work. And she knows part of what I’m taking out is going directly to her music subscription. I titled my post as rent but never framed it that way to her.”
OP asks if she is a jerk for doing this. What do you think? Here is what others think:
She Can Find Her Way To Work
“Music subscriptions, car insurance, unlimited data cell phone plan – all are luxuries that a teen should be able to pay for. Additionally, the same teen could be responsible for finding their way to and from work.
The simple solution is to drop the subscriptions and ask your daughter to find her way to work. Buses are cheap. Ubers are pricey.
Not a jerk.”
You Should Not Make Her Stress
I agree. I think where OP is the jerk is where he is probably making his daughter feel stressed about money. Oh, my family is struggling? I need to save all my money to be independent one day… and just stuff like that. I think he might be giving his daughter a money scarcity complex.
I think OP should let his daughter pay for her music subscription directly. He should give her the money for a basic phone plan, but if she wants the better one, she can pay the difference. And I think it’s reasonable for her to pay for the gas.
You Are Responsible For Her
“You’re wrong. You have complete financial responsibility for her until she’s an adult, that’s what you signed up for when you became a parent.”
She Is A MINOR
“You’re wrong. She’s a minor. If you want her to pay for her music subscription, tell her, “hey, you’re responsible for paying for your entertainment now.”
But necessities like gas are on you as the parent unless she has her car. (Kind of BS to hold her responsible for gas to get her to a job that you say you need her to have to make rent and grocery bills)
ETA: or driving herself to anywhere that’s not school or work.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.