Coming out is a unique and challenging experience for many people. There is no one-size-fits-all approach, and what is helpful for one person may not be helpful for another. The most important thing is to do what is right for you and to seek support from others during this process.
But what if your trusted network made fun of it or outed you before you were ready? A user and a mom asked on user, “Am I wrong for telling my son that he is obviously gay?” Here is the story for you.
Backstory
The Original Poster (OP) has a son who is 17 years old and has been in the closet for the past 7 months. The OP says that his son is pretty masculine and straight-acting, but he has a boyfriend for the past 7 months.
What Does He Do
He baby talks to his boyfriend, hug him, calls him handsome, shares clothes, sit close to each other to the point where they are almost cuddling, closes his bedroom door when with him (not with any other friend), sees him every time day, buys gifts, etc.
What Else Does OP Do
For the past 7 months, OP’s son has also made an effort to smell good, fixes hair really nicely, dress nicely, etc.
Related: Sister Made Homemade Food For Everyone Except Her Brother’s Stepdaughter. We Think She Is Justified.
What Happened Today?
The OP asked his son if he would invite his boyfriend on their family trip, and the OP’s son got awkward and said it was not funny.
What Did OP Say
OP asked what he meant, and he clarified that “I am straight; that’s not funny.” OP laughs at this comment, and when she realizes he is severe, she laughs even harder.
What Happened Next
The OP then tells him that he was obviously in a relationship with this guy and did a terrible job hiding it. OP’s son got emotional and asked the OP to not say anything to the dad.
What Did This Make Him Feel?
OP’s son got upset, saying she outed him when he wasn’t ready, and he hadn’t spoken to the OP in a couple of days. OP asks whether I am wrong in what I did.
What do Others Think Of This?
We went through many comments only to find everyone blaming the OP.
From “you did not give him the time or space to come out on his own” to “laughing at him” and “being callous,” – there were several reasons. However, many stood with the OP because her intent wasn’t malicious, but she could have handled it better.
You’re A Jerk
“You are a jerk, OP for labeling the other kid as your son’s boyfriend before your son was willing to do this himself.”
Scary Time For Him
“He might not have realized how obvious it was, and it is obviously a scary time for him, and you laughed at him. You are his mother, and he should be able to count on support in times when he is scared, not ridicule.”
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This article originally appeared on Mrs Daaku Studio.