The decision to work outside the home or stay home is a personal one, and does not reflect on a woman’s worth.
A user asked the forum, “Am I a jerk for demanding respect from my DIL, and if she can’t, then get out.”. Let’s read the complete story to know how is wrong here.
BACKSTORY
The Original Poster (OP) is a young MIL; she is only 39. She says that she had her kids pretty young, and she is very lucky that her husband makes a lot of money, so she doesn’t have to work.
WHAT HAVE THEY DECIDED?
She says that she was a SAHM for a long time, and once they started to spread their wings, instead of going to work, she and her husband decided she would be a homemaker and be active in the community.
That’s what she has been up to, and she tries to make the community a better place.
OLDER SON GETTING MARRIED
Now, her oldest son, 22, was married, and she was really excited until she met her.
WHAT DID OP FEEL ABOUT HER DIL?
She says that her DIL is a very blunt and very business-focused person.
OP actively dislikes her DIL but tries to be polite for her son’s sake.
WHAT’S THE REASON?
She says that she doesn’t like her because she has brought a wedding gift for her DIL, and she handed it over, saying it was from her and her husband.
Her DIL responded that it was just from OP’s husband since she knew it wasn’t her money that paid for it.
OP said that she is volunteering; well, that’s not a real job since it doesn’t make money.
WHAT DID OP DO?
She feels that it’s passive-aggressive, and she has talked to her son about it and even once with her to try to clear the air.
WHAT’S THE REAL ISSUE?
They had a get-together last night, and OP made a homemade meal. When she was playing with everything, she came up and made the comment no wonder she could make a home-cooked meal as she doesn’t do anything else with her day.
OP says that she lost it and told her that she needs to respect her or get out of her house.
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
Her DIL was shocked and then started to cry when she kicked her out.
Her son is angry, and they had a huge argument, and he called her a jerk. OP feels that she needs an outside opinion.
SHE IS A JERK
“Wow. She’s a total jerk. Just because you don’t conform to her “Business Focus” personality doesn’t mean you’ve done anything wrong. You and your husband have worked for the two of you, AND you volunteer for the community.
Whether it pays or not doesn’t take away from the commitment and responsibility you show to others. DIL is a piece of work.”
THAT’S VERY SMALL OF HER
“She’s putting you down for being a SAHM for what? Gigs? That’s very small of her, she’s a jerk, and the fact that you’ve talked to your son about this and how he’s most likely seen her make these comments makes him a jerk too.
I firmly believe that you don’t marry someone because they get along with your family, but that doesn’t mean they get to treat your family like trash.”
YOUR SON IS A JERK
“Somebody welcomes you into their home, cooks you a meal, and your response is backhanded comments like that?
You son is also a jerk because he doesn’t want to deal with the fact his wife is rude, and instead is making it your problem because, to him, that’s easier than addressing the real problem. A coward for letting somebody come treat his own mother like that and just watching it happen.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.