Why can’t people just pay for their fair share and ditch the old practice of splitting the bill evenly at restaurants? A netizen recently asked, “Am I a jerk for refusing to pay $45 for a soda and half an appetizer?”. We want to hear your thoughts!


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Last weekend, one of the Original Poster’s (OP’s) friends organized a group to do fun things. They rented a van and went to a few breweries/wineries. 


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When they returned, they stopped at a pub to hang out before going home. There were about 12 of them, so the staff seated them at a table. People ordered food and drinks. When the check came, one of the guys quickly gave his card and, after signing, looked around and said, “Okay, everyone, Venmo me $45”. 


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This threw OP off because many people had ordered meals, sides, drinks, and shots. On the other hand, OP ordered a Diet Coke (she had to drive 1.5 hours home) and shared an appetizer with her husband. 


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OP asked if they could Venmo him for what they ordered, and he seemed annoyed. Next, he sent everyone a picture of the receipt and had everyone Venmo him for what they got.


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For context, OP is fine splitting the bill evenly when everyone orders roughly the same thing. 

“But also, if I ever put my card down, I always ask everyone if they want to split it evenly, not just assume,” says OP. 


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OP’s husband thinks she’s being cheap and should’ve split the bill evenly with everyone. 

“I know I’m more money-conscious than others, so I’m wondering, am I the jerk?” asks OP.


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OP later edited the post and added the following information:

“We were expected to pay me and my husband $90 (including tax and tip). Since my husband had a drink and a shot in addition to what I had, the total we paid was $53 (including tax and tip).”


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“Not the jerk. You aren’t cheap, and you aren’t willing to pay more for others who might take advantage of splitting evenly. 

 A funny thing I saw several times: those who want to split evenly usually get the most drinks and expensive food. That way, they can save some bucks, and others don’t want to speak up because they will be called ‘cheap’ by those people.”


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“Not the jerk. I hate these people. Guarantee he ate/drank over the $45 and is so obtuse that he doesn’t understand that you pay for what you consume. Screw him, and once again, you ain’t the jerk!” 


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“That’s messed up. Checks should be split ahead of time; not just one takes care of it. Large parties need to discuss ahead of time. But, of course, you shouldn’t be paying for others’ meals.”


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“Not the jerk. Wanting to pay for what you ordered isn’t cheap, but eating/drinking way more than someone else and expecting them to cover half of it is. Bill splitting is awful because it invites exactly this, and I’d never speak to someone again if they pulled something like this.”


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“Not the jerk. The person who has the most expensive order is usually the person who demands an equal split. Don’t let them get away with it.”

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