A user asked, Am I wrong for blowing up at my mom when she said I turned out so good because she sent me to rehab for weed at 13?
Backstory
What Happened Next?
OP gets that weed isn’t for 13-year-olds but says his parents took it way too far. OP spent the next three months in an expensive rehab facility for troubled teens.
OP was the youngest and smallest; most were 16-18. And they weren’t in there for weed; most did hard drugs and had mental issues.
What Did OP Experience?
OP’s roommate was a 17-year-old who was detoxing from meth and pills and who also had unmedicated bipolar. A few nights, he’d stare at OP and not sleep.
What Else Happened?
They were in their rooms 18 hours a day; everything else was meals or bad arts and crafts. It was hell, but it worked; OP was too terrified to have friends, much less do drugs.
What Happened Next
OP wanted to go to NC with his family at 18, but OP’s therapist encouraged him to repair their relationship.
OP says, “We have a rocky one, which is why I moved out, but we’ve been working on healing, and it’s been cordial. I was there for easter with the whole family, and my mom congratulated me.”
What Did She Say?
She said she was so thankful she had OP sent to “get help” as a kid; otherwise, OP would be some junkie. But now OP is a perfectly functioning member of society.
What Did OP Do?
OP lost it; OP called her several things, including some bad words, and left. OP’s sister (18F) said that while she agrees, OP is hurting himself by holding on to so much anger over what happened.
What Do People Have To Say
“Not a jerk. You were traumatized by your experience. This has been building up for some time.
You may not have reacted the best way, but what she did was too extreme for a single joint. Keep up with the therapy. Maybe NC for a while will be good for you.”
This Was Repressed Anger
“Just imagining being a 13-year-old among almost fully grown young adults who did actual hard drugs and had other mental issues?!?! Terrifying!
OP came out traumatized and afraid of making friends, then the mother has the gall to say something like that?! Of course, there’s repressed anger, and I, for one, would prefer NC over having a tenuous relationship with them.
OP, do what you think is best for you.”
Not A Jerk
“I would say not a jerk because you smoked once and were sent to rehab for it… It may have helped you eliminate some bad behavior, but rehab at that age for just that is too extreme, IMO. Your mother overreacted and exaggerated, so I understand why you blew up.
The only advice I will give you is to write your mother a letter about how you felt about what she said. This way, you avoid getting into a yelling match without being able to express how you feel correctly.
Whatever she does with it is up to her, but what she does can undoubtedly make or break this relationship.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.