You threw a birthday party for your loved one, but they didn’t show up on time. Are you going to let this go, or will you give up on making efforts for them in the future?
An internet user recently asked, Am I a jerk for canceling my boyfriend’s birthday party after he failed to show up on time?
Here’s the full story for you to find out:
It was OP’s (26F) boyfriend’s (30M) birthday last month. They didn’t spend it together because he was away with family. So OP decided to organize a birthday party with a couple of his friends. Everything was settled, the place, the time, everything.
What Happened Before They Needed To Leave For The Party?
Maybe 3 hours before they needed to leave for the party, OP got a call from a colleague asking if he could come help him with something at work and OP’s boyfriend accepted. He promised he’d be back in time for the party.
They were supposed to leave at 7:30 pm but he wasn’t there so OP tried calling, but he didn’t pick up. So OP left a voicemail, saying she was leaving for the party and he needed to join her there.
What Happened Next?
By 9 pm, everybody was there but not OP’s boyfriend. They all waited for him, but at 10, as he still hadn’t arrived or given any news, his friends started leaving one by one, and OP decided to cancel the party altogether.
She texted her boyfriend: “Party canceled, everybody went home, and so did I.”
What Happened When He Came Home
When he came home an hour later, they fought, and he left. OP didn’t know where, until his mom texted her, saying that he was horrible for what she did and that he would stay at hers for a while.
“I do feel bad because I know he was really excited about the party.” Says OP. OP wants to know if she is a jerk
That’s Pretty Weird
“But if I were you, I’d be wary of a 30-year-old running home to mommy after something like this and her texting you. Does he often have colleagues calling him to go to work from 4:30 pm to 11 pm without contacting you the entire time?”
A HUGE Red Flag
“Ummm… in what way could you possibly be the jerk? Your boyfriend blew you (and all his friends) off, ignored his phone, and then blamed you for not keeping everyone around for hours and hours without him. You’re not the jerk, he’s a jerk, and if he isn’t sincerely thanking you and apologizing to you very soon, this is a HUGE red flag. I’m guessing his mommy didn’t get the truth when she texted you about how you treated her prince of a baby boy.
Yuck. He had better have a damned good reason why his “I’ll be there on time” turned into ignoring you and being three and a half hours late.”
He Canceled It, Not You
“Not the jerk, and you didn’t cancel it, he did.
His friends came. They stayed at least an hour…while he didn’t show. And he didn’t apologize or send any message. He was a jerk. Even if it was an absolute emergency, he needed to be courteous enough to tell you and the friends waiting for him.
During the fight afterward, did he explain? Recognize that he was disrespectful? Give you any information? He probably got a message from his mistress and stayed late. Good riddance.”
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