Temperature preferences are a very personal thing. But who on earth lets their children be cold even after having the means to fix things for them?

A netizen recently asked, “Am I a jerk for not letting my daughter control the thermostat?”. We’re all ears for your opinion on the matter!


Closeup portrait of sneaky, sly, scheming young woman plotting something isolated on gray background. Negative human emotions, facial expressions, feelings, attitude
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

The Original Poster (OP) is from the United Kingdom. 

“I am struggling to see why we are the jerks as my parents and sister deemed. My husband uses social media and thought this space would provide a third insight that we are missing,” says OP 


Amazed african man and woman with open mouths looking at camera over pink background
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

OP (40F) and her husband (42M) have two daughters: Jane (22F) and Lisa (5F). This concerns Jane, who has been struggling with the cold.


Confused young woman shrugging shoulders, don't know what to say, isolated on white background. Body language. Studio shot
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

Jane started complaining about the house’s temperature now that it’s no longer summertime. 

“Currently, we leave the central heating off all the time apart from in the early morning (5-7 am) so Lisa doesn’t get too cold when she is awake”, says OP. 


Excited african American young man in glasses isolated on grey studio background feel emotional have good mood, bored biracial millennial woman in spectacles cover mouth distracted lost in thoughts
Image Credits: fizkes, Shutterstock

OP and her husband don’t have an issue with the house’s temperature (it’s approximately 16°C at night across all of the bedrooms since they checked in case her room was draftier). 

“We don’t feel it nor see where Jane is coming from. Jane complains and says she wears multiple layers to bed and around the house while we are all asleep”, says OP. 


Stubborn noisy african american child girl in screaming at annoyed tired black father, naughty kid daughter with attention deficit yelling, manipulation, family fight, parents and children conflict.
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

Jane asked if she could access the thermostat to switch the heating on at a higher temperature than 18°C (what they set it as). She wants to raise it to 21°C, but OP and her husband said no. 

“She keeps complaining about wearing four layers to bed so she doesn’t feel cold in the morning. Lisa says it isn’t cold when we ask her. My husband and I also don‘t feel the cold, so we said no to her asking and thought that would end it,” says OP 


2. wow excited
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

It did not end. They had dinner at OP’s parents’ house, and Jane commented on how warm and toasty her grandparents’ house was. 


Portrait of brunette woman spreads palms, shrugs shoulders with perplexed expression, being indecisive, has no idea what happened, wearing striped dress. Indoor studio shot isolated on gray background
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

“My parents were shocked that we didn’t allow her access to the thermostat, and they tried to convince us to give her access because it isn’t right for her to sleep in multiple layers. 

My sister agreed with them and said my daughter has valid points since the temperature starts dropping at night. Are we wrong here?” asks OP. 


Clear expressions of intense discomfort and fear. Troubled by bad news, she's in turmoil, urgently needing assistance and solutions
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

“You’re the jerk. It’s not that you can’t afford to raise the thermostat, and it’s not that raising the thermostat would make the rest of you uncomfortable. You reject every option for a heat source (like a heated blanket or space heater) other than raising the thermostat. 

You don’t care about your daughter. You don’t care that she’s too cold. Also, 16 degrees is insane to keep a house at.” 


Young confused man shrugging shoulders, spreading hands isolated on pink background. Studio shot
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

“You’re the jerk. Give your daughter solutions; don’t make her just put up with it. The simplest would be to raise the thermostat a little, as the rest of you wouldn’t overheat, and she might be comfortable then.

Different people have different comfortable temperatures. I would be satisfied with your average temperature, as would two of my children. My wife and third child would not, and it’s hard to sleep well when you’re too cold.” 


Amazed young woman in trendy outfit holding hands on cheeks and looking at camera against yellow background
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

“You’re the jerk. Your house sounds freezing cold. It’s currently below 10 degrees outside, and you’re not using the central heating; of course, she feels cold. Having the house set to 18 degrees at 9 am, it will be cold at night if you don’t run the heating in the evening. 

Just because you are happy with less than 16 degrees doesn’t mean everyone else must be. You are being a jerk about this, but at the least, you could buy her a cheap electric heater. You can get them from Screwfix for like £25.” 


Young boy with a surprised expression on white background
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

“Your child is cold. No one should be cold. You have the resources to stop her from being cold. You choose not to do that. You’re the jerk. Case closed.” 


stupor surprised funny face expression
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

“United Kingdom houses are traditionally colder indoors than North American houses in the winter, and many people are just fine with it. They grew up that way. In addition to everything else, 

I suggest you get the daughter, who always feels cold, evaluated, especially for thyroid issues. There might be medical reasons why she feels cold, and the rest of you don’t.”

Brother Furious As Sister Declines His Invitation For “Overflow Wedding”. Says, “He Needs To Make The Bride Happy”. Netizens Think He Is Crazy. You Decide

Unhappy middle aged spouses experiencing crisis in marriage, upset husband and wife standing next to each other at kitchen, having quarrel, woman crying, copy space. Conflicts in relationships
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

Brother’s wedding is an important event but can there a reason big enough for you to miss it? You decide who is a jerk.

Sister Refused To Host Nephew’s Birthday Party At Her House. Says “He Isn’t Allowed In My House”. We Think She Has A Point.

Image Credits: Deposit Photos

Is it reasonable for a woman to refuse to host her nephew’s birthday party at her home because she was unhappy with his behavior there? You Decide.

Woman Refuses To Move Aside On The Hiking Trail For A Group. Says, “You’re Rude”. Husband Requests Not To Escalate The Situation. Is He Right?

Beautiful Woman Climbing on the High Rock in the Mountains. Adventure and Extreme Sport Concept
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

Is it okay to walk casually in a large group while you’re on a hiking trail and not care to make space for other people? You decide.

Groom Shocked As To-Be-Bride Forgets About His Daughter’s Peanut Allergy. Says, “I Don’t Listen Well”. Thinks She is Right.

Image Credits: kravik93, Shutterstock

How would you respond if your negligence resulted in a child’s hospitalization and a wedding cancellation? An internet user asked, “Am I a jerk”. You decide.

Father Demands Daughter Split The Inheritance Equally Despite His Mother Giving Everything To One Granddaughter. Says, “She Intentionally Set It Up For The Daughter To Fail In It”. Is This Reasonable?

Clear expressions of intense discomfort and fear. Troubled by bad news, she's in turmoil, urgently needing assistance and solutions
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

No matter how logical you think you’re being, questioning a dead person’s will and wanting to make changes as you please is not at all… read more.

This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.

Similar Posts