Saying something mean can never be justified or can it be?

A user asked, Am I wrong for saying it’s easy to be a perfect mom when you don’t have kids to someone infertile?


Portrait of happy family - father, mother, daughter and son - against grey background. Parents with children having fun at home.
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

The Original Poster (OP) (28F) has a 2-year-old son. OP’s brother, “Tommy” (25M), has been dating “Giana” (22F) for a few months now.

Giana Is Judgmental

angry woman
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

OP says, “She’s a little judgmental, not of me mainly, but in general. She babysits other children and constantly judges the parents. She says she’d never let her kids act the way the kids do. Sometimes it makes sense, and I agree. She claims that her future kids will never, ever throw a tantrum.

They’ll accept no the first time, the only time. I’ve told her good luck with that when it comes to toddlers. My son is learning no and has appropriate consequences for tantrums, but he’s learning. It’ll happen.”

Giana Is Infertile

Photo of gorgeous woman with Cleopatras makeup, closeup portrait of beautiful female with stylish haircut isolated on black background, young lady wearing fashionable golden necklace, beauty salon
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

It’s also important to note that Gia is infertile. She can’t have kids without medical intervention or adoption.

Read: He Took Care of His Daughter For Two Weeks While Wife Was Away. Says, “For all the work that I did, the one tiny mistake I made, and she slammed for after 2 weeks.” Is He Right?

OP’s Son Had A Melt Down

child screaming, angry tired stressed neglected boy
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

Saturday night, they went out for OP’s dad’s birthday dinner. OP messed up and didn’t prepare her toddler well enough. He got overstimulated and began melting down.

OP Calmed Him Down

mom and son
Image Credit; Deposit Photos

OP quickly took him out of the restaurant to calm him down before he could cause a scene. It took 5 minutes, and they returned; he got food and was all good. Giana started, “my future kids will NEVER act like that in a restaurant”. I ignored her.

OP’s Son Wandered Off

angry teen boy
Image Credit; Deposit Photos

The next day, OP, Tommy, their parents, OP’s son, and Giana went to the mall for an event they were having. OP’s son was playing in a structure, and she had her eyes on him. OP’s mom asked her a question, and she turned to answer her. When she turned back, he was gone.

Panic set in, and OP, OP’s parents, Tommy, and some people nearby, began helping me look. It only took a few minutes to find him, and he was perfectly fine; he had seen a pretzel cart and wandered off.

Read: He REFUSED To Let The Passenger In Front of Him To Recline Her Seat on a Flight. She Calls Him A Jerk. Is This Justified?

OP Was Worked Up

Teen woman with headache holding her hand to the head
Image Credit; Deposit Photos

OP says, “I was still pretty worked up, holding onto him for dear life. He had never wandered off before. My mom reassured me, saying it happened to her with both of us kids. Then I hear Giana, “why weren’t you watching him?” I tried ignoring her. Then she said, “I would’ve never let him wander off”.

I was already so worked up and upset I snapped. I said “it’s easy being a perfect parent when you don’t have kids. Come back to me when you do.” Giana got visibly upset. She then made Tommy take her home.”

Tommy and Giana Think She Was Insensitive

Portrait of disappointed afrcan-american teenage girl, showing tongue from dislike and thumbs-down, judging something bad, standing over yellow background.
Image Credit; Deposit Photos

Tommy and Giana have both texted OP telling me how insensitive that is since she can’t have kids. To OP, she talks about having kids all the time, so why is it different for me to say that? OP wants to know if she is a jerk.

You Weren’t Referring To Her Infertility

Photo of unsatisfied angry lady wear bright clothes disappointed bad behavior results isolated on purple color background.
Image Credit; Deposit Photos

“Not a jerk. You weren’t referring to her inability to have biological children. You were referring to her inability to keep her yap shut.

Yeah, it’s pretty easy to say you’d never do something when you don’t have kids. Kids aren’t accessories; they’re individual human beings who can and will react differently.”

She Doesn’t Have A Free Pass To Be A Jerk

Photo of unhappy upset sister brother dressed denim shirts biting fists hand arm isolated yellow color background.
Image Credit; Deposit Photos

“Not wrong – Having fertility issues does not give her a free pass to take shots at other people.

Also – you did not take a shot at her for having fertility issues or suggested that her opinion doesn’t matter because she will struggle to have biological children. You said that since she isn’t currently a parent, she cannot understand the challenges of being a parent and should reserve judgment until she has experienced being a parent. She can be a parent. That journey, when she starts it, may be more difficult for her.”

Parenting Comments Are NOT Welcome

Portrait of young beautiful shocked amazed impressed speechless girl wear glasses isolated on green color background.
Image Credit; Deposit Photos

“She’s crazzzzzzzy pants to think her kids will be perfect.

So..admit that what you said wasn’t the best thing and then address the bigger issue of her parenting comments. Because, really.”

She Thinks She Is An Expert Without Experience

pretty hispanic woman raising hands to head, open-mouthed, feeling extremely lucky, surprised, excited and happy
Image Credit; Deposit Photos

“You are not a jerk, but Giana sure does think she’s an expert on something she has no experience with! And no, I don’t count babysitting as the same experience as having your children 24/7. You didn’t insult her ability to have kids, and if she really wants children, I assume she hasn’t ruled out adoption. I would have snapped, too and she sounds like no fun to be around.”

More From Mrs Daaku Studio:

young pretty woman looking shocked, angry, annoyed or disappointed, open mouthed and furious
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

Strange but True: 10 European Habits That Leave Americans Scratching Their Heads.

We wanted to know what are the European traits that Americans find strange.

10 European Habits That Leave Americans Scratching Their Heads

10 Endangered Jobs That May NOT Be Around Much Longer

A beautiful young Caucasian woman with her hand in her hair.
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

Some professions are becoming obsolete as technology, and societal shifts continue to shape the workforce. We bave listed some jobs that don’t see the light in the coming years.
10 Endangered Jobs That May Not Be Around Much Longer

Kill It: 10 Frugal Things That You’re Doing, But Aren’t Worth it ANYMORE!

Photo crazy astonished guy see incredible vacation sales discounts impressed, raise modern bright specs wear white clothes isolated over blue color background
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

While being frugal is a wise financial practice, not all frugal habits appeal to everyone. Some may find certain practices tedious, uncomfortable, or just not worth it anymore.

Kill It Now: 10 Frugal Things That You’re Doing, But Aren’t Worth It Anymore

11 Most Hated or Useless Jobs That People Wish They Could Eliminate From Society

Close up photo beautiful her she lady unexpected epic fail arms hands fingers near mouth bite teeth eyes full fear oh no expression wear casual white t-shirt clothes isolated violet purple background.
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

The modern job market is diverse, and each profession has a unique value. However, specific jobs may be considered useless, providing little benefit to society.

11 Most Hated or Useless Jobs That People Wish They Could Eliminate from Society

Don’t Get Duped: 10 Biggest Rip-Offs That You Are Continuously Buying

Surprised and impressed brunette girl looking amazed and pointing fingers down.
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

As consumers, we often fall prey to clever marketing tactics and gimmicks that convince us to buy overpriced products or services that don’t live up to expectations.

Don’t Get Duped: 10 Biggest Rip-offs That You Are Continuously Buying

This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.

Similar Posts