Taking someone’s food and refusing to replace it is annoying and can create conflict. A user asked the forum, “Am I a jerk for telling my girlfriend she can’t have my Clif Bars anymore?”. Read the entire story to know who is wrong here.
BACKSTORY
The Original Poster (OP) recently started buying peanut butter Clif Bars, which he eats exclusively while working out. He says that he cycles about 300-400 km/week.
A few weeks ago, his girlfriend caught wind of this and absolutely loves peanut butter.
WHAT DID OP SAY?
She asked him if she could have a bar now and then, and he told her to go ahead but that he would also appreciate it if she would replace the ones she eats since he saves them for his workouts.
He knows how much he should have left since he keeps track of how much he eats per workout.
NO CLIF BARS
While prepping for a 200 km trip the previous day, he saw that he was completely out of cliff bars. It was also 5 am, so nothing was open to buying some new ones.
HOW DID HE MANAGE?
He ended up having to cook some last-minute rice cakes, which meant he was about an hour late for the start, which kind of threw his entire day’s schedule out of whack.
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
When he got home, he told his girlfriend that he didn’t want her eating his Clif Bars anymore if she didn’t replace them.
WHAT DID HE TELL?
He also added that she should buy her own directly instead.
WHAT WAS HIS GIRLFRIEND’S REACTION?
His girlfriend got defensive and told him she planned to replace them but hadn’t gotten around to it yet. Today she came by his home office and told him she bought him a new box, with a sarcastic “you’re welcome” at the end.
He asks if he is a jerk.
OP’S CLARIFICATION
He thought he was being pretty reasonable in asking that she either replace them or get her own, but he has had a few friends and family tell him that he was overreacting over just energy bars and that it’s not that big of a deal if his girlfriend eats some of them.
IT IS DISRESPECTFUL
“Not a jerk. Taking a bar once in a while and replacing them is one thing. Eating the LAST ONE is plain disrespectful.”
WHAT’S THE PROBLEM FOR HER?
“She wanted to replace them on HER schedule, which doesn’t work for you. I’m not sure why buying her own is such a problem if she likes them so much.”
THEY ARE EXPENSIVE
“They’re expensive, and she isn’t replacing them. This is like people eating someone else’s lunch.”
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