In a traditional family structure where the wife is a stay-at-home parent, men often assume more responsibilities outside the home and may have specific expectations for their wives’ contributions within the household.
A user asked the forum, “What would your expectations be from your wife if she was staying at home (not employed)?”
TAKING CARE OF KIDS
“Keep the kids alive.”
GO GROCERY SHOPPING
“My wife is a stay-at-home mom, and my expectations of her are just the basics. Feed the baby, keep the house somewhat clean, and go grocery shopping.”
SUPERVISE A CHILD
“Currently in this boat.
My expectations are that our children will be supervised until I finish work. We have two kids, so I treat it like my wife is working to pay for daycare for both of them.
Thinking about it, I guess I also expect a few pictures to be taken of them each day and for there to be some sort of learning opportunity or novel experience for them.
But I don’t know if that’s because that’s what I think she should do or if it’s just the status quo. Maybe both?
Every once in a while, I wind up watching them both, and I’m completely wiped, so I definitely don’t expect her to maintain the house or cook every meal or anything because I couldn’t do all that.”
LET HER ENJOY
“Let her enjoy herself. I wouldn’t have a wife at home like that if a discussion was needed about what she should be doing.
If you’re home and see things that need to be done, do it. Shouldn’t need to assign chores. I’m not your dad.
Leave the mowing to me, though; that’s my me time.”
HOME COOKED MEALS
“Clean house and home-cooked meals.”
TAKE BREAKS
“My wife stays home, and sometimes I wish she would do less. She takes care of two kids, cooks, cleans, works out (she’s incredibly fit for two kids and in her mid-30s), groceries etc.
But sometimes, she won’t give herself a break and will work herself into the ground. I try my hardest to give her as much “her” time as possible, but since I work two jobs, it’s hard sometimes.
No matter what, I have a tremendous amount of respect for the work she does. I have two jobs, and she works 3x as hard as I do.”
FURTHER EDUCATION
“I mean, what CAN I expect? If there are no kids at home, there’s only so much to do. I suppose I expect that she be doing something to further her education or training or something. Or engaging in some other project like writing a book or starting a business.”
DON’T SPEND ALL THE MONEY
“Keep the house clean, and don’t spend all the money.”
COMMUNICATE YOUR NEEDS AND FIND JOY
“Expectations? What am I, her boss? I would hope that she communicates her needs and finds joy.”
HAVE MY BUTTON SHIRT READY
“Have my button-down shirt on with nothing underneath when I walk in the door.”
BE FIT AND HEALTHY
“She will be caring for children, so no energy to work. When she has the energy, she can keep herself fit and healthy and do what housework needs to be done.”
FIND SOMETHING NEW
“Yes, of course. The only thing would be to make food, which she likes. And search for a new job at her pace or start studying to do something new.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.