Why would anyone invite someone who mistreated them all through their life to their big day?

A netizen recently asked, “Am I a jerk for not inviting my mother’s husband to my wedding?”. Let us know what you think in the comments section!


wedding bride upset
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

The Original Poster (OP) (22F) is planning a wedding so she and her husband can legally marry. 

“We got religiously married a year ago, but we want a wedding to make it legal,” says OP. 


Image Credits: Usa-Pyon, Shutterstock

Her (OP’s) mother’s husband, whom OP shall call “David,” was very abusive to OP growing up. He abused OP mentally, verbally, emotionally, and physically. 


I'm tired of listening to you. Family conflict between father and daughter. daughter sits right in front of the camera and looks displeased.
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

He excluded OP from family trips and events growing up. OP shared that one time, the family was going to an aquarium. 

“I saw everyone packing their bags and thought I was going. I was getting ready to pack my bags. My mother told me that I wasn’t going. I asked why. She said, ‘There’s not enough room in the car.,'” says OP. 


father daughter fight
Image Credit: Oleg Golovnev, Shutterstock.

OP’s grandma said, “I overheard the conversation, and I’m sorry. David said that he didn’t like you and thought you were annoying. Don’t worry, I’ll take you skating, and we will have so much fun. We are also getting dinner.” OP’s heart was crushed. 

Her (OP’s) mother’s husband went on to abuse OP from ages 13-15. He would constantly disrespect OP’s autism and bipolar disorder. 


Senior grey-haired woman wearing turtleneck sweater standing over isolated white background Pointing to the eye watching you gesture, suspicious expression
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

Her (OP’s) grandma was a sweet, kind lady. She passed away in 2022. When they were doing funeral arrangements, he said, “We should cremate her. Burying her was too much of a hassle. It would cost us less money.”

OP got angry and told him to shut up as it was against Grandma’s religion to bury her. He would purposefully provoke OP to make her react, and then she’d get in trouble. 


wedding lavish
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

OP and her husband got married when OP was pregnant with her daughter. She’s seven months old now. OP’s husband is loving and kind. He would defend OP against her family.


Argument between mother and daughter, whereas the mother is talking to her ignoring and stubborn looking daughter who turned her back on her
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

They are getting everything set up. The wedding will be in December. OP made a Facebook group about the wedding. OP’s mother asked OP about invites and if she could invite her husband. OP refused because of how he treated OP, and she did not want him to ruin her wedding.


Photo of unhappy aggressive brunette hair woman wear red dot shirt wtf confused reaction problems loser isolated on cyan color background.
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

“My mother went radio silent. Then, I had people from my mom’s side of the family bashing me and telling me I was being a bully for excluding him. Am I a jerk?” asks OP. 


young pretty woman with cheerful, carefree, rebellious attitude, joking and sticking tongue out, having fun
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

“How is this even a question? He should be in jail and far away from you and your wedding. If your mother let him treat you this way, she should also be so far away from you. Screw the ones bashing you, it’s your wedding, do whatever you want.”


Young russian woman isolated on white background confused and doubtful shrugging shoulders to hold a copy space.
Image Credits: Deposit Photos.

“Do yourself a favor and cut your mum out as well. She is a terrible mother for letting her husband treat you like that. It might seem like only he was the ‘bad guy,’ but the fact that you were her blood and she let you be treated that way makes her behavior worse. Put yourself first. Cut her out. Not the jerk.”


The portrait of disgusted woman on studio background
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

“Not the jerk. There is no reason to have the abuser at your wedding or the person who went along with his abuse (your mother). There is no reason to have them in your family’s lives. Go no contact.”


Close up portrait of disappointed, shocked, pretty, charming, stylish woman with wide open mouth and eyes, looking out glasses, holding eyelets with fingers, isolated on grey background
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

“Not the jerk. Disinvite your mother. They aren’t family if they didn’t do anything to mitigate the harm your mom and her husband did. You owe them nothing. Invest the money you will save for your new life.


Photo of unsatisfied angry lady wear bright clothes disappointed bad behavior results isolated on purple color background.
Image Credit; Deposit Photos

“He hurt in a myriad of ways. You have the right to feel safe at your wedding. Cut him out of your wedding the way you have cut him out of your life. If your mother continues to complain, explain to her in extreme and graphic detail every moment of abuse, especially physical abuse. 

If she still doesn’t get it, tell her to leave him home or don’t come. Again, you have the right to feel safe at your wedding, and having him there would make you feel unsafe.”

More From Mrs Daaku Studio

Image Credits: Deposit Photos

Mother loses her calm as Son refuses to help with younger siblings on a vacation. Says “If You Cannot Help The Woman That Birthed You, Get Out and Pay For Yourself”. Thinks It’s Fair. Read what happened here. 

Father Corrects Teacher’s Pronunciation of Daughter’s Name; School Accuses Him of ‘Questioning Authority’. Is This Ok?

Girl looking desperate about angry mother. Mother shouting to unhappy daughter.
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

A father has to deal with school authorities who accused him of questioning authority. says, the only thing he did was correct pronunciation. Read: Father Corrects Teacher’s Pronunciation of Daughter’s Name; School Accuses Him of ‘Questioning Authority’. Is This Ok?

Her Family Invites Her Over and asks NOT To Bring Her Adopted Kid. Suggest “Sending Her To Sleep Away Camp.” Is This Justified?

Wrong behaviour. Aggressive angty mother and father screaming on a kid while being in a room
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

What do you do if your family isn’t supportive of the adopted child you have? Read – Her Family Invites Her Over, Asks NOT To Bring Her Adopted Kid. Suggest “Sending Her To Sleep Away Camp”. Is This Justified?

Wife Decides To Teach Son’s A Lesson, Cuts Short Vacation Time To 1 Day. Husband and Mother-in-Law ACCUSE Her Of “Ruining It”; Give Silent Treatment. Is She Right?

Really annoyed man in black t-shirt against grey background
Image Credits: Deposit Photos

The wife decides that she needs to teach Son’s a lesson, and cuts short vacation time to 1 day. Their husband and mother-in-law accuse her of “ruining it” and give the silent treatment. Is she right? We definitely think so. Read what happened.

Boyfriend Furious As Girlfriend Takes His 1967 Impala To Scrapyard Behind His Back. Says, “I’ll Sue You and Make You Pay”. Is This Really Messed Up?

angry hatred
Image Credits: Roman Samborskyi, Shutterstock

Boyfriend furious as girlfriend takes his 1967 impala to scrapyard behind his back. Says, “I’ll Sue you and make you pay”. Is this really messed up? Read what happened here.

This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.

Similar Posts