Healthy relationships require boundaries, but one partner dictating another’s diet is unfair and invites conflict.

A user asked the forum, “Am I a jerk for not letting my GF eat the naan bread we ordered?”. Read the complete story to know what happened.


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The Original Poster (OP) and his girlfriend got takeout from an Indian restaurant they like and ordered from usually when their budget allows them.

He says that particular place is the only good Indian place anywhere near them, but it is very pricey, so they try to keep their order small: one entree for him, one for his girlfriend, and a side of naan bread that they share.


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He says that the side of bread isn’t very much, and the entree just isn’t the same without it.


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So it seriously annoys him when his girlfriend eats the bread without dipping it in her curry.

It’s such a waste of the little bread that they get.


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He says that he had told his girlfriend before, but she says it’s not his concern how she eats her food. But he says that it is her concern because she is wasting a shared side.

He added that he let it go each time.


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He says that her girlfriend didn’t order curry that day like she usually does; she got biryani (rice and meat), so he was happy that he would get the bread for himself.


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While they were eating, she reached over for the bread and ate a piece on its own.


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He got annoyed and moved the bread away from her and told her she didn’t need the bread since she wasn’t eating a curry, whereas he was eating a curry, so he did need bread.

He also added that his girlfriend’s entree came with rice, and she could eat that.


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Her girlfriend got offended and ended up threatening not to pay her share of the food next time. She called him a greedy jerk, took her food, and ate the rest in the bedroom.


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OP says that his friends are split; one of them says he was in the right, and it’s too much carbs for one meal for her to have bread and rice, but the other friend essentially also called him a greedy jerk.

He says that it has been hours, and his girlfriend is still ignoring him. He asks if he is a jerk.


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“You are a gigantic jerk. You don’t get to decide for someone how they eat their food. If you are splitting the bill, she gets to eat some bread.

Regardless of whether you think it is being wasted or eaten. Go say you’re sorry before you’re single.”


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“Do you know that naan, roti, and other Indian flatbreads are often eaten on their own… just order some more and quit complaining.”


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“She wants to eat the yummy naan, and she’s allowed to eat it however she damned well wants to (with or without dipping). It’s not up to you to decide whether she’s eating it correctly or not.”

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