Men are often stereotyped as being strong, stoic, and fearless. However, the truth is that men are just as capable of experiencing fear and vulnerability as anyone else. There are many things that men are afraid to admit, but are actually really common.
A user asked the forum, “What’s something that most men are afraid to admit, but that’s actually really common?”. Here are the common replies.
SHAME AND VULNERABILITY
“Like most here say, shame and vulnerability. It hits hard, and it feels like a giant wall that’s nearly impossible to get past and open up to someone about it.”
WANTING OTHERS TO BE PROUD
“Wanting people to be proud of us.”
BODY ISSUES
“Men also struggle with body issues. Both ends, too fat or not fit enough.”
DEPRESSIVE THOUGHTS
“Depressive thoughts. I’ve always been very quiet about this aspect of my life, and sometimes it’s difficult to express myself.”
LONELINESS
“How lonely we are. We are invisible to most of society if we are single. And I’m not talking about just girls, but friendships even. I never talk to anyone about it because it’s not a good look for us.”
FEELING DOWN
“That I’m scared. I’m worried. I’m nervous. I just want to be held and told that I’m doing ok.
Mostly that, but also the spider is creeping me out.”
BREAKUP HURTS
“That breakup hurt us too. We may play it off better, but that sticks with us on a deep level. I’ve broken up with exactly one partner, and it hurt me to my core because even though I KNOW she was bad for me, it still hurts.”
CRYING
“I’m scared of many things. I do cry. Sometimes I do break down because of emotions; I just don’t tell/show anyone.
I do have a soft spot. Just because I like cute things or pink things, it doesn’t mean I’m gay. Sometimes I’m lost and have no idea where I’m going or what I’m doing in my life.”
MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES
“Struggling with mental health issues but feeling too embarrassed to reach out for help cause men are supposed to be strong, tough, and not talk about their feelings.
Even though we all know that’s bad, it’s still programmed into our culture, and it’s hard to overcome.”
VIOLATION BY WOMEN
“Being violated by women, and we should never be afraid to call them out.”
WORRYING
“We worry a lot. It only seems to increase as life happens. Add a wife, kid, house, and job – every new thing adds more worry.”
BEING SCARED OF COCKROACHES
“I can’t and won’t kill a cockroach for you. I just can’t. I’m going to run away screaming like a little kid.”
BEING A GOOD DAD AND SELF CARE
“Finding the balance between earning a living wage, being a good dad, and self-care is near impossible. Most of the time, I feel like I’m scraping through on the wage and being an ok dad (which fills me with guilt). My self-care is close to nothing, and I feel burnt out and tired constantly.”
TALKING ABOUT HOW THEY FEEL
“Talking about emotions/feelings. Men don’t really have these moments where they’re truly vulnerable around other people. Women seem to have these moments with each other all the time.
Men are more like OOGA Booga. Want to have a beer and talk about a movie or video game or show or work or sports? There’s not as much vulnerability and talk about emotions/feelings. Which leads to millions of dudes bottling in.”
APPRECIATION
“The vast majority of guys just want to feel appreciated. It’s not that they need high praise or anything; just a thank you every now and then is all that’s needed, even if it’s something that’s “expected” of them.”
TAKING CARE OF CHILDREN
“So in my country, mostly women are seen as the ones that should mainly take care of the children. But I try to do as much as I can and don’t shy away from taking care of my children.
What do I get for that? That my wife is ridiculed by her parents and that I am looked at as some saint for just taking care of my children. This also bleeds into our relationship; since she gets ridiculed, I get blamed for that by her.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.