How does it feel when someone cancels a plan at the last moment?
An internet user asked, “Am I a jerk for going on vacation with my daughter?”. We need you to find out!
BACKSTORY
The Original Poster (OP)(33F) is taking her daughter (10F) to the beach for vacation and her birthday.
“She’s been wanting to go to the beach all summer, and I am just now taking her,” says OP.
MOM AND SISTER JOIN THE PLAN
At first, OP was going to take her daughter for her birthday. But when OP told her mom about the plans for her daughter, she and OP’s sister wanted to come too.
“They couldn’t go on her birthday weekend due to it being bill week, so we planned for the week my daughter would be out of school for fall break (yes, they get those here).”, says OP.
MOM AND SISTER EXIT THE PLAN
The dates were set and agreed upon. She (OP) told her boyfriend this, and he wanted to go too. OP said okay. He asked his boss, and she said he could make the day up. A week before, OP’s mom and sister backed out of the trip.
THE VACATION PLAN IS STILL ON
She (OP) still wanted her daughter to have her beach vacation/birthday. At first, OP’s boyfriend said he would cover the cost of the hotel, but he didn’t book it. So OP did before the prices went up on the hotel she wanted.
“I took off for the week to give my daughter the vacation she deserved. My boyfriend knew of the dates”, says OP.
BOYFRIEND DITCHES LAST MOMENT
Today, at the 11th hour, OP’s boyfriend hits her with a snag, stating that they must leave a day later because he can’t get off.
“What the hell? I already have time off, and the hotel and car are booked. I told him I couldn’t get my money back and I was not wasting my vacation time and to meet us there. I don’t know if he will. We are still leaving in the morning as planned without him”, says OP.
IS OP THE JERK?
“So, am I a jerk? On the one hand, I do want him to go, but on the other hand, he’s had ample time to get himself together, and I refuse to ruin my daughter’s vacation that she’s been looking forward to all month”, asks OP.
MORE CONTEXT
She (OP) later edited the post and added the following information:
“He procrastinates a lot when it comes to paying for things. I reminded him daily about our trip, and he refused to book it, so I did. I think he did it to get out of paying.”
PRIORITIZE YOUR DAUGHTER OVER HIM
“Not the jerk. You should not be expected to postpone the vacation your daughter is looking forward to because of his lack of organization. Prioritize your daughter over him and take her to the beach. It’s crazy that he expects you to cancel all your reservations for him.”
GOOD FOR YOU
“Not the jerk. Enjoy your beach time with your daughter. Your boyfriend’s procrastination and poor planning do not necessitate your daughter’s emergency and postponement. Good for you, OP, for keeping your word.”
NOT YOUR FAULT
“Not the jerk. It is your daughter’s vacation & she is excited. His poor planning is not your fault. He can meet you there if he wants to go. If not, he can stay home. Waiting for him seems unreasonable if you ask me.”
WHY ARE YOU STILL WITH HIM?
“Not the jerk for the vacation, but for being with a guy who cares more about his comfort than your daughter. You should not make this person a part of your daughter’s life much longer.”
NO JERKS HERE
“No jerks here. It is your trip with your daughter. When many other families came, it made sense that your boyfriend was coming too. Now, they’re not. Maybe a boyfriend can join it for part of the time, but he shouldn’t have been required to book or pay for it.
You handled it fine. Stick to your original schedule, and if your boyfriend can join, so be it. What matters is mother-daughter time. Hope your daughter has fun!”
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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.