As parents, we always worry about our children and want to do the best for them. But where do you draw the line? A Redditor took to the forum and asked, “Am I wrong for not letting our daughter move back home?”
The Original Poster’s (OP) husband and OP had 3 children, a 25-year-old daughter, a 16-year-old son named, and a 13-year-old daughter.
Three years ago, the oldest daughter moved out of her parent’s home with her boyfriend (whom she has been dating for almost 4 years now). They rented an apartment together and could make ends meet with their full-time jobs.
What Happened After?
The cost of living in their area had significantly increased over time, and their landlord raised their rent by 40% in just three months. Resultantly, they couldn’t afford to stay there anymore. They were struggling with finances and could not find the funds for the first month’s rent, security deposit, and last month’s rent.
They planned to temporarily live with her boyfriend’s parents to manage this situation until they could get back on their feet and save some money. However, her boyfriend’s parents refused to allow her to stay with them, leaving her in a difficult situation.
To deal with this, they thought she could live with her parents (OP and OP’s husband), and he could live with this. This way, they can save money and be gone in 6 months. OP and her husband didn’t feel that was appropriate.
What do OP and Her Husband Think?
According to them, she was an adult and needed to learn to take care of herself, not relying on handouts from her parents. OP’s daughter offered to pay rent, but they would only do that if she agreed to pay the market average plus her share of utilities, which would mean she couldn’t save up like she wanted to.
Because they couldn’t agree, she (the daughter) had been forced to share a 2-bed apartment with 6 other people, some of whom OP’s daughter found “sketchy .”OP felt for her, but she thought it was her daughter’s responsibility to make ends meet.
At that point, OP’s daughter didn’t call much anymore, and OP was worried that that may have impacted their relationship.
Was OP right in her decision not to let her daughter stay with her? Was it inappropriate for OP to ask for market rent even though she agreed to pay something and gave a timeline too? What would you do in this situation?
This article originally appeared on Mrs. Daaku Studio.