Talking to our children about their love lives can be a delicate matter. We want to be supportive and understanding, but we also want to be careful not to say anything that could hurt their feelings.
The Original Poster (OP) took it to the forum, and asked “Am I wrong for telling my son’s boyfriend he can’t just keep showing up at the house?”. We want to hear from you.
BACKSTORY
OP’s son Tyler has been dating a guy named Marius for some time now. OP likes Marius for the most part, except for the ‘rough bike riding’ part.
Marius comes to their place often to hang out with OP’s son.
VISITING TOO FREQUENTLY
Recently, Marius started visiting their place very frequently. He used to come for breakfast, lunches, and dinners and would stay for long hours.
Sometimes, he would also go to their place beforehand just to wait for Tyler to return.
WAS IT BOTHERING OP?
OP was a little bothered by these frequent visits, and she also noticed a slight discomfort on her son’s face as well.
WHAT DID OP DO?
One day after Marius dropped Tyler at home, OP called him on the side and confronted him.
WHY HAVE YOU BEEN AROUND SO MUCH LATELY?
OP asked Marius the reason behind the frequent visits. She also told him that although they loved having him around, it would be for the best if he could limit his visits to regular business hours.
She said that sometimes Tyler could also go over to his place as well, instead of him visiting every time.
HOW DID MARIUS REACT?
Marius didn’t say much. He just had a very weird look on his face and said “Yeah fine”. He then walked away.
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT MORNING?
Th next morning, OP heard her son shouting and screaming, so she went upstairs to her son’s room to find out what was happening.
Her son confronted her and asked how she could say such a thing to Marius!
WHAT DID OP REPLY?
OP told Tyler that she did it because she thought he was uncomfortable with this as well.
WHAT IS THE REASON BEHIND THE FREQUENT VISITS?
Tyler told OP that he, indeed, was uncomfortable with the frequent visits, but he tolerated all of that for the sake of Marius.
Marius recently came out to his dad, and the situation in his place wasn’t very merry. That is why Marius avoided staying at his own place as much as he could.
OP asks if she is a jerk for asking her son’s boyfriend to limit his visits to their home.
WHAT DO PEOPLE THINK?
“Why did you not talk to Tyler before talking to Marius?”, said one user.
I FIGURED, HOW COULD YOU NOT
“Before you got to the part where Tyler told you what’s happening at Marius’ house, I already figured out something’s up at his home.”
YOU SHOULD HAVE TALKED TO YOUR SON FIRST
You should have asked Tyler first, especially after you noticed he seemed uncomfortable.”, said another user.
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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.