A wife took care of her sick husband but went to her parents’ birthday party anyway, which made her husband unhappy.
A user asked the forum, if she is a jerk for leaving her sick husband at home?
BACK STORY
The original poster’s husband Harry has been in bed with the flu for about a week then. He was miserable with a headache, nausea, and a relatively high fever.
So, OP has been working from home to be able to keep an eye on her husband throughout the day.
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
It was OP’s younger siblings’ birthday on Saturday and OP’s husband and OP were invited over to her parent’s house to celebrate.
On Friday, Harry told OP he wasn’t feeling up to a children’s birthday party, which was understandable. OP said that she wouldn’t necessarily want to be around rowdy children if she was sick either.
WHAT DID OP DECIDE
So OP decided to go there on her own, bring over the presents, stay for an hour or two, and be back home before dinner.
WHAT DOES OP SAY
OP says that after spending days holed up in their flat taking care of her husband, she was honestly grateful for the opportunity to get outside for a few hours. OP addressed that When she told Harry, he didn’t comment on it but he did seem a bit grumpy afterwards.
SHE LEFT THE HOUSE
Saturday came, and OP drove over to her parent’s house in the afternoon. OP says they live about 20 minutes from her parent’s house.
OP LEFT HARRY
OP left Harry with some painkillers, tea, and tissues on the nightstand so he wouldn’t need to get up while OP was gone. OP also told her husband that he could call her in case something happened.
The party went great, and OP got back home after about 2 hours without any calls from Harry. So, OP assumed everything had gone well.
HER HUSBAND GOT UPSET
OP’s husband was frowning all evening, and when OP asked whether he was alright, OP’s husband called her selfish for leaving him alone and accused OP for not caring about his well-being.
WHAT DID HE SAY
OP’s husband told OP that she should have stayed home with him instead of having fun alone while he was miserable. OP says that her husband has been giving her the silent treatment whenever she tries to talk to him about it.
WHAT DOES OP SAY
OP says that It’s been a few days, and she thought he’d have calmed down by now, but he’s still sulking, and OP started to wonder whether his reaction was reasonable.
And OP asks if she is a jerk.
HE NEEDS TO GROW UP
“He needs to stop acting like a baby. You went to a kid’s party at your family’s house, for god sake. You didn’t come home drunk, you told him he can call for emergencies. He needs to grow up. He had the flu like a lot of people do.”
HE IS IMMATURE
“The flu is really bad, but your husband is an adult and he can spend a few hours taking care of himself. Perhaps it would be a shock to your husband to learn this, but there are plenty of people out there who will spend an entire week taking care of themselves! Even if they are sick! Sometimes, longer than a week!
Your husband sounds immature. And I hope this is just an isolated incident.”
YOU MUST HAVE STAYED HOME
“Hold it. You went to a kids party knowing your husband was ill. Didn’t it occur to you that you might be carrying the virus and pass it to the other guests? You should have stayed home to prevent the spread of whatever he has. Also, are you sure it’s the flu?
I might be a bit biased at the moment as I’m recovering from a bout of covid. (I used a home test.)”
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