Should a DJ who plays a requested song that leads to a proposal at someone else’s wedding be blamed?
A user asked, “Am I wrong for ruining a proposal at a wedding?”. Read the complete story to know who is wrong here.
Backstory
The Original Poster (OP) is a 27-year-old male with a part-time DJ job. OP primarily DJs for just family and friends as he is not really a professional, just does it for a bit of side cash from time to time.
What Happened Next?
Last weekend, OP got invited to DJ at a wedding for a friend of a friend. At the wedding, while everyone was on the dance floor, one of the guests named “Kevin” approached OP and asked if OP could play the song “Golden Hour.”
Odd Request
It was an odd request because at this time all the guests were literally hopping around and dancing, but OP was told to take all requests so did it anyways.
OP Started Playing It
When OP started playing it, the dance floor started to clear up, and Kevin invited a woman onto the dance floor. They started slow dancing for a bit, and a few people joined them (including the bride and groom)
What Did Kevin Do?
Then at that one part of the song, Kevin got down on one knee, and OP knew right away that he would propose.
What Does OP Say
OP says, “I didn’t think it was right, especially because they were in the middle of the dance floor with all eyes on them, and I kinda felt like if this happened, I would take the fault because I was the one to put on a romantic song out of nowhere.”
So instead of letting that happen, as soon as he pulled out the box, started playing “BOOGIE” and turned up the volume instead. After that, Kevin side-eyed OP and got up, and everyone else sat down. After that, nothing else happened and the tension was very thick.
What Happened After?
After the wedding, no one really brought it up, and OP thought that OP wasn’t the jerk, and the friend that was friends with the bride said that OP wasn’t.
Family Started To Message
But then a bunch of the family started to message him. It turns out that Kevin was the bride’s brother, and the family kept asking why OP did that; OP told them that proposing at someone else’s wedding was inappropriate.
They told OP that OP shouldn’t have an opinion because OP was just the DJ, and now Kevin got publicly humiliated because some people knew this was going to happen, so they were taking videos and live on Instagram, so all their friends could see.
What Did OP Say?
OP responded, “That would’ve made the newlyweds hurt,” but then they came back with, “You shouldn’t have assumed that the bride didn’t want that.”
That part got me thinking because OP was mainly communicating with the bride about arrangements, and she was very chatty before the wedding, but after that, she kept giving OP one-word answers.
OP says, “So I assume she is mad at me, but then again, when she paid me, she almost doubled the amount I was asking for with a generous tip? So I’m unsure if the bride knew I think she would’ve told me. But am I wrong for just assuming?”
Bride Should Have Told You
“If the bride knew this would happen and approved it, she should have told you beforehand. Going with not a jerk. Your heart was in the right place. Protect the bride and groom’s day.”
They Should Have Proofed The Plan
“Ya maybe hindsight is 20/20 here. But if I’m the guy proposing, I’m making sure every important person (like the DJ you’re requesting a special song from) is in the know. Make sure one of the bride or groom tells them that it’s chill if the guy uses their wedding as the spot to propose. Honestly, I’d want the bride and groom to tell the DJ together that it’s ok.
Maybe I’m just an over-analyzer but I would be playing out every possible thing that could ruin the proposal before actually doing it and ensuring those things are figured out. And if I can’t shore it all up, then I’m not proposing.”
I Think Bride Is Happy
“What if the bride was put on the spot, and she’s secretly happy you messed it up? Takes the pressure off of her and lets her have her wedding? I think your bank account agrees, you are not wrong.”
Your Heart Is In The Right Place
“Not wrong. Many families may have known about this, but that doesn’t make it okay. They planned to mess up the bride’s day by hijacking the wedding for their purposes.
It was not OK with the bride. The bride either didn’t know or was coerced into allowing it. The double pay and the generous tip show how happy it made her that you messed up this plot. To those who wanted to hijack the occasion, you’re the villain. To the bride, you’re the hero, even if she can’t publicly acknowledge it.
Rest assured; you did well.”
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