Past experiences give us pain and trauma. It can also prevent us from enjoying things ever again and even change our perspective completely.
A user asked the forum, “What is a very specific thing you cannot enjoy/do because of a bad relationship you had in the past?”. Here are the common responses.
CAN’T TRUST WORDS ANYMORE
“I can’t trust words anymore and am now more observant of actions.”
CAN’T DANCE AND TELL JOKES
“I went out with a girl when I was 16, and we were together for six years. She often picked on me for almost anything and everything, most notably, ‘Do you have to dance the way you do?’ as if I was hurting anyone. ‘Do you have to tell jokes to people?’ again, as if I was hurting anyone.
Now, at 36 years old, I don’t go anywhere near a dancefloor or even think of telling jokes to anyone outside of my friend group. She made me hate everything about myself.”
HAVE A HARD TIME WATCHING LORD OF THE RINGS
“I have a tough time watching Lord Of The Rings (LOTR). It was one of my favorite series growing up. I’d have movie marathons multiple times a year, but I watched them with my boyfriend/fiance. He died before we finished the marathon, and I haven’t been able to bring myself to watch them since. Also, the last movie I saw with him was Guardians of the Galaxy, and those got ruined for me, too.”
CAN’T LET OTHERS CONTROL ME
“I can’t let others control me anymore, let alone an ex-partner I don’t care about. I’m not letting the thought of them stop me from doing something I enjoy.”
PAINTING
“Painting as in the interior. My ex-girlfriend always wanted me to paint whenever we rented a new apartment. Before her, I liked painting, but I just got tired of it after her.”
CAN’T LET A MAN CONTROL WHAT I WEAR
“Can’t let a man control what I wear. I dated a guy once who had a problem with me wearing shorts in public. So I started wearing only long pants/jeans/sweats in public.
One day we decided to go grocery shopping at a nearby supermarket, and I just went in my home clothes, oversized t-shirt and shorts that were at least 2 inches below my butt cheek (I don’t find a problem with revealing shorts, just not my style preference). Anyway, the whole time, I was very focused on getting stuff from our grocery list; meanwhile, he kept trailing close behind me, complaining about my shorts and trying to tug them lower, which I genuinely thought was him being funny because I had never experienced anything like that.
We reached home (I was driving), and he exploded at me and accused me of not listening to him. I was genuinely shocked and questioned why he tried to control my clothes. He threw a 2-liter bottle of soda we bought from the grocery store at my face. Survival mode kicked in, and I pretended to give in and said let’s go inside. Tricked him into getting out of the car, immediately locked the doors, and drove off.”
CAN’T TRUST DOCTORS
“I have a hard time trusting doctors because of several misdiagnoses for my various ailments, watching a ventricular aneurysm kill my father, and now watching helplessly as my wife has to go through dialysis treatments, not being able to run to town when we want, not being able to or drink what we want.”
CAN’T LISTEN TO BLACK VELVET
“I can’t listen to Black Velvet because of a great relationship that ended last month.”
CAN’T TAKE CRITICISM
“I can’t take criticism without getting too defensive.”
CAN’T LISTEN TO MAZZY STAR
“Mazzy Star used to be one of my favorite bands, but I can’t listen to her anymore.”
DON’T BELIEVE IN COMPLIMENTS
“Believe compliments. They are told to everyone. I naively believed that I was special and beautiful.”
CAN’T PLAY DESTINY
“Can’t play Destiny 2 as we played it so much, and it’s part of what drew us together. It’s also a game best played when part of a fire team, and she is also part of the same clan, which I have subsequently left. It’s a shame because I loved playing it before and when we were together for the experiences, not just the game itself (it’s not as good without people to play with regularly).”
TABLETOP GAMES
“Tabletop games. I tried to go into a tabletop gaming store a few years ago and had a panic attack in my car.”
FERRIS WHEELS
“Ferris wheels. First and last time on one. I had one of the worst nights of my life after that.”
HATE THAILAND
“Can’t see, read, eat, or think about anything related to Thailand; I just get mad. I have my reasons.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.