Being kind and wanting good things for others is not the same as making them do what you want or deciding things for them.
The Original Poster (OP) took it to the forum, and asked “Am I wrong for suggesting my goddaughter to rethink her career choices?”. We want to hear from you.
BACKSTORY
OP is 41 years old now. His friend, Mike, asked him to be the godfather to their daughter, Chloe, when she was born. OP gladly accepted the offer.
OP’S RELATIONSHIP WITH CHLOE
OP and Chloe have always had a good relationship.
OP enjoyed helping her out with schoolwork and projects alongside his own kids. He never differentiated between them, and used to consider Chloe as his own kid.
CHLOE’S ACADEMIC EXCELLENCE
Chloe was always extremely academic. She always got top grades. Because of that, everyone assumed that she would go to med school once she grew up. She also expressed her desire to be a doctor from a very young age.
THEY MOVED
Mike, his wife, and Chloe moved away a few years back. Although OP didn’t meet them for a long time, they had always kept in touch online.
THEY MET FOR DINNER
So many years later, they finally met for dinner recently. Chloe is now 17.
CHLOE’S ASPIRATIONS
At the dinner, OP asked Chloe about her career plans, to which Chloe replied that she wanted to be a gardener or anything in the horticulture domain as she loves nature.
HER PARENTS SUPPORTED HER
Chloe’s parents were fully supportive of their daughter’s decisions. They also explained to OP that Chloe had been recently diagnosed with anxiety, which is why it would be better for her to choose a career path with lower stress levels.
OP’S REACTION
OP was in shock, especially because he knew how good of a student Chloe was. So, he asked her why she would throw away her dreams and aspirations like that, especially when she herself had always wanted to be a doctor.
OP also added “I also mentioned that becoming a gardener is not a cure for mental illness, at which point Chloe and her parents went quiet and we didn’t talk much more for the remainder of the evening.”
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
Before leaving, Mike pulled OP aside and told him that Chloe got upset at OP’s remark. He also added that they would always support Chloe in everything she wants to do.
OP still feels he isn’t wrong for wanting the best career for his goddaughter and is confused why everyone else, including his wife, isn’t supportive of his reaction.
Now OP wants to know if this is wrong.
WHAT DO PEOPLE THINK?
“If your goddaughter doesn’t want to do it, don’t make her do it. This is not a job for anyone who isn’t wholeheartedly, foolishly committed to the grind, to being broken on the wheel of work and anxiety.”, said one user.
“Also saying that gardening won’t cure mental illness shows a profound lack of understanding as to why she chose the way she did.”, said another user.
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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.