A first date can be a magical experience that creates lasting memories. However, if it turns out to be a disappointment, it’s best to end the connection right then and there. A user asked the forum, “What is your automatic “NOPE!” on a first date?”. Let’s look at some of the best responses.
BEING ON PHONE
“I’ve done a bit of dating, including online. The only time I’ve ever felt the urge to walk out on a date was this one who wouldn’t look me in the eye, spent a lot of time on her phone, and generally didn’t seem interested in conversation.
It kind of felt pointless sitting there, trying to amuse her over and over and failing. But maybe she was just having a bad night or was nervous; I wouldn’t actually do that to someone unless they were a flagrantly bad person. Some basic decency is in order otherwise.”
OPEN MOUTH CHEWER
“Aside from all the obvious red flags (rude to wait for staff, talking about exes, unable to hold a conversation), mine has to be someone who is an open-mouth chewer.
I didn’t even know that was something that bothered me until I went on a date with one. Immediate turn off.”
TAKING ALL ABOUT THEMSELVES
“When all they talk about is themselves.”
ZERO INTEREST
“When they have 0 interests outside of social media, drinking and going out with friends…to drink. The word vapid comes to mind.”
BEING RUDE TO STAFF
“Being rude to the staff is a nope for me. Hasn’t happened yet, though.”
ENTITLEMENT AND MISANDRIST ATTITUDE
“Talking about how mentally ill or “wild” or depressed she is, spending a lot of time looking at her phone, talking about her exes or other guys she’s interested in.
Displaying any sense of entitlement or misandrist attitudes. I’m sure I can think of more, but those are ones I’ve seen.”
A MAN INVOLVED IN HER LIFE
“She reveals that she has a kid or that there is a man involved in her life.
I’ll never forget some girl telling me on the first date that she lives with her ex-boyfriend. No, thank you.”
REFERRING MEN AS A JERK
“All men are a jerk. But not you. You’re good.”
Oh. I’m so flattered to have passed their little test, and I’m “One of the good ones.” Unfortunately, I’m not into being in a potentially emotionally abusive and gaslighting relationship, and unfortunately, I have men close to me in my life that I don’t appreciate being referred to as jerks.
CHEQUE PLEASE.”
RACIST
“Being racist or bigoted. There was a girl I went out with who, despite finding to be super attractive, I ended the date early with because she was repeatedly being racist and xenophobic and said that I was “one of the good ones” when it came to non-white people.”
CATFISHING
“Catfishing. Using old photos of them young and thin.”
BEING MEAN TO ANIMALS
“Being mean to animals or talking bad about them. I love animals and couldn’t be with someone that doesn’t like them.”
BULLYING HIS BROTHER
“A girl was sorta, maybe? In the process of asking me out, I cut her off and flatly rejected her because I knew she bullied my younger brother. Yes, my brother can come off as a jerk sometimes, but he’s my family. Happened a LONG time ago, as I was in high school at that time xD.
This very same brother of mine once noped out a date (I realized this because he came back home early) because the girl kept saying she thought of him as “intimidating” and looked uneasy when saying so.
This prompted my brother to eventually sit with her in a coffee shop to try to engage in conversation; she mentioned the “being intimidated” thing a couple of times, so he asked for the check, paid for both, thanked her for her time, and left.”
NOT HYGIENIC
“When you can tell their hygiene is seriously lacking.”
BEING RUDE
“Unkindness, rudeness, meanness, and pettiness.
If a person is rude, unkind, or petty with other people, they’ll be petty with you, too.
Dealing with that kind of person is exhausting. We all have eggshells that we worry about our partner stepping on, but petty people don’t deal with broken eggs very well.
To quote one of my favorite writers:
“When given the choice between being right and being kind, choose kind.”
If a person can’t choose kindness, I’m not gonna choose them.”
SELFISH AND ARROGANT
“Selfish, arrogant (I just had an experience with a woman who was like that; she didn’t even realize how bad she acted, and when she texted the next day, wanting to meet up, I said after how bad she behaved last night I wanted her to delete my number and not contact me anymore, I promptly blocked her.).”
INVOLVED SO MUCH IN POLITICS
“Talking politics. I don’t even care if we agree; I’m just profoundly not interested.
I was on a first date with a guy once back in the late ’00s, and when he pulled out his phone, his phone case was a giant picture of Obama’s face.
I liked Obama just fine; I voted for him twice, but man. If you’re that invested in politics, we’re not going to be compatible.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.