Sidelining one of your kids because the other had been severely ill some time back is not cool!
An internet user asked, “Am I a jerk for losing my temper with my parents and sister and telling them she should take everything I have, including my clothes, since she deserves it so much?”. Here’s the whole story for you to conclude:
BACKSTORY
The Original Poster (OP) is a 16-year-old male with a 14-year-old sister.
“My sister was diagnosed with a rare form of leukemia when she was six and had ongoing medical needs for five years. She’s been healthy for the last three years and returned to ‘normal'”, says OP
OP WAS NEGLECTED
OP’s parents put OP on the back burner in a significant way, and they were not there for him. OP was either bounced around to different family members or left alone.
“My birthday was forgotten for a few years, and Christmas was about her, and I was asked to make sure she had all the gifts and joy she could get because it could be her last. I was miserable, and I know none of us were happy, but I felt like I was there as a prop to try and cheer her up sometimes”, says OP.
INCIDENTS OF FAVORITISM
OP’s sister would ask for stuff, and OP’s parents would move heaven and earth to get it, and sometimes it was stuff OP had. Before OP’s sister got sick, their parents bought OP a bean bag chair for his room, which was probably expensive, and gave it to her.
“When I brought home a treat from school, they would ask/tell me to give it to my sister to cheer her up, and sometimes she would ask for it. When I didn’t bring something home for a while, they would ask me if I ate it like it was some crime I committed,” says OP.
THE CHRISTMAS SWAPS
They went to see Santa for a few years after OP’s sister was sick, and OP got a better cheap toy that they swapped because OP couldn’t have something a little nicer than her, which meant he got stuck with a lot of jewelry-making stuff or sparkly pink stationery kits.
“Last Christmas, I got clothes while she got a new phone,” says OP.
WHEN OP TURNED SIXTEEN
OP turned 16 in June and saved to buy a gaming laptop. It was a lot of saving his wages and buying nothing, but OP wanted it.
“My two best friends decided to give me money to get it, and they came with me to pick it up,” says OP.
WHAT HAPPENED LAST WEEK?
Last week, OP’s parents and sister were in the living room when OP got home from school, and his parents told him his sister wanted to play games with her friends (computer games) and that they thought since OP had a gaming laptop, he could give it to her since it would make more sense than going out and buying a new one.
ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE
When OP didn’t answer immediately, they said, “Oh well, of course, you could always share it between you.”
OP lost it. He started yelling and cursing. He told them, of course, she should have it. OP went into his room, took his clothes, and said she should have all that, too.
“I said, why not take my bed and give it to her? Then I pointed out that she had a new bed and my bed was 12 years old. I told them to take everything I own since she deserves it all, and I don’t deserve anything because I never got sick as a kid,” says OP.
THE FINAL FUSS
“My sister didn’t say a word, and my parents were shocked, but then they were pretty annoyed with me and asked me what I was behaving like that for. Things have been tense since. Though I still have my laptop. Am I a jerk?” asks OP.
YOU ARE IN THE RIGHT
“Not the jerk. Your parents should have better ensured your needs weren’t entirely on the back burner. It couldn’t have been easy with your sister being so sick, but meeting your needs was essential. I am sorry it went down the way it did. But you are absolutely in the right, standing your ground.”
IT WAS LONG OVERDUE
“Not the jerk. Sounds like that outburst was long overdue. I hope your parents think about what you said after they are done being annoyed. Hide the laptop now.”
KEEP YOUR LAPTOP SAFE
“Not the jerk and your parents have been cruel to you. Keep your laptop somewhere safe and password protected so they can’t just give it to her. Can you talk to anyone in the family about this awful dynamic your parents have set up?”
IT’S DISGUSTING
“It’s disgusting that they want you to share the computer you bought with your money. They think that yours is also your sister’s property. Please keep proof of purchase to prove it’s your property alone.
Your parents better wake up soon and see their mistakes. If not, they will wake up one day without their other child, left alone with a spoiled child that they created.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.