When the boy visited his aunt’s house, he won every round of a game with his cousins. One of his cousins started crying, and the boy’s mother became harsh with him. Was this fair?
A user asked the forum, “Am I a jerk for not going easy on my cousins when no one told me I was supposed to?”
BACKSTORY
The Original Poster (OP) (17 M) was recently over at his aunt and uncle’s house. OP says that they have two kids, his little cousins Willow (9) and Miles (6).
HER AUNT GIFTED THEM A SWITCH
OP’s aunt recently bought a switch for the cousins, and they’ve been getting obsessed with Mario Kart.
COUSINS CHALLENGED HIM
OP says that almost immediately, the cousins challenged him, his parents, and his sister to a race. But he had to go help his uncle with his car (he works part-time at an auto shop and has promised to take a look at it) but said that he would be back to race once he finished it.
IT FELT ADORABLE
About thirty minutes later, OP came back into the house, and his cousins met him at the door to get him to race, and OP felt that it was adorable.
OP SMOKED THEM
OP says they sat down and played, and he smoked them.
He says that he is not particularly good at Mario Kart, but he has been playing for a while, and they just started playing two weeks ago.
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
OP says that his cousins demanded a rematch, and he obliged, then when he smoked them again, a re-rematch. After several rounds went by and not a single victory later; Willow was in awe of his “epic skills,” but Miles started crying.
OP’s aunt, having heard Miles crying, came into the room, and he explained the situation.
AUNT COMFORTED HIM
His aunt comforted Miles while OP’s mom took him aside. There had been an unspoken agreement between OP’s mom, aunt, and sister to go easy on his cousins and let them win.
OP’S MOM CALLED HIM A JERK
OP’s mom called him a jerk for being “so mean” to his cousins.
OP told her that he didn’t know, and she called him an idiot because, apparently, it’s common knowledge to go easy on kids.
HE DOESN’T KNOW
OP says that he doesn’t know such common knowledge and thinks that he may be just a jerk like his mom said.
OP asks if he is a jerk.
NOT A JERK
“Not a jerk. But this is sort of a “read the room” thing. Kids don’t need to win every time, and it is good for them to learn to lose gracefully.
However, if you’re competing against elementary school-age kids, there’s a point to notice that the kids are getting frustrated and figure out how to make the game fun again – instead of seeing who can win the 3rd time, say, “let’s try to get all the power-ups” or “let’s try goofy track X” or something.
It’s not about intentionally throwing the game, and it’s about finding ways to meet kids at their level of ability and have fun with them.”
YOU NO NEED TO LET THEM WIN
“Yeah, not a jerk. You don’t need to let them win; just make sure you’re still having fun. You could teach them a few tricks to get better – my brothers taught me how to improve my Mario Kart game with jump cornering and other little hidden things like track shortcuts when I was a kid.
That helped make it fun even though I could never beat them.
You could explain to the kids you’ve been playing a solid 10+ years over them. Start handicapping yourself. Give them head starts, and make a silly rule like you have to pull over and do a bottle flip challenge each lap before you continue or something.
Just make sure the kids are having fun.”
YOU WEREN’T THERE
“Not a jerk. No one told you; you didn’t know. Whether or not to go easy on a kid depends on the family; you couldn’t have known that everyone expected you to go easy because you literally weren’t there.
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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.