Choosing to take your boss to an event over your fiancée can be a difficult decision. On the one hand, you want to support your career and build relationships with your colleagues. On the other hand, you don’t want to neglect your personal life or upset your loved ones.

A user asked the forum, Am I a jerk for choosing to take my boss to a charity event over my fiancee? 

BACK STORY

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The original poster started working at his company about a year ago. OP and OP’s boss hit it off. So much so that his boss frequently visits and sleeps on the couch in their basement.

BUILD A HOUSE

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Image Credits: Roman Samborskyi, Shutterstock

He says that he and his fiancee have lived together for several years and just recently built a house together, so it has plenty of space, and his fiancee doesn’t mind him staying in the basement, but they don’t interact much.

TICKETS FOR CHARITY EVENT

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He also said that a month ago, he purchased tickets for a local charity event that he had taken his fiancee to the previous year. He did not indicate he would take her this year, but she assumed the 2nd ticket was for her.

DIFFICULT CODE DEPLOYMENT

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OP says they had a difficult code deployment the previous evening that the boss and they were up quite late for. After its success, they had a nightcap, and he mentioned the charity event that weekend.

INVITED THE BOSS 

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OP’s boss mentioned that he had always wanted to go, so OP invited him to go under his 2nd ticket. 

He says that his boss was elated, and he thought also this would be good for his career progression as charity is a cornerstone of the company they work for.

He told his fiancee that morning that his boss had never attended the event and was excited to go. 

HIS FIANCE WAS ANGRY 

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OP’S fiance said they would all have a great time as last year was so much fun. He then told her there were only two tickets and she wasn’t going. She was angry.

HE CAN’T BUY MORE TICKETS

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OP also addresses that tickets are sold out already, so he can’t just buy another. He told her that she needed to consider his career progression and that he could always take her again next year.

IT IS WEIRD

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“Your whole relationship with your boss is weird ………why the hell is he sleeping on the couch in your basement. Are you sure you don’t have feelings for him?”

CAREER PROGRESSION

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Not to mention that if his boss is sleeping in his basement, the term “career progression” would be way too glam for his job.

IT MAY HAVE NEGATIVE IMPACTS

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“You might be unknowingly in love with your boss or him you. Why is your 48 yo boss sleeping on your couch some nights?

Prioritizing your interesting relationship with your boss for the sake of your career may have negative impacts on your romantic relationship. YTA. You knew she thought the second ticket was for her. Also, being a buddy-buddy with your boss does not mean you’ll get career advancements. It means you have a friend who happens to be your boss.” 

TRYING TO REPLACE GIRLFRIEND WITH BOSS

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“Are you trying to replace your girl with your boss?? Seems like you enjoy this relationship with him a lil too much *side eye*.”

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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.

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