Half-sibling relationships can be challenging. There are often complex dynamics involved, and it can be difficult to find common ground. But what happens when parents start to push you to bond with your half-sibling?
A user shared her story and asked, “Am I wrong for refusing to use the money I inherited from my mother to pay for medical treatment for my half-sister, who has a life-threatening sickness? She is my father’s child and the woman he cheated on my mother with.”
We want to hear from you.
Backstory:
OP says, “When I was 25, we discovered that my father had been cheating on my mother for years, and he had a 7-year-old daughter with his mistress. The happy family I knew was gone in one split second, and I went through the darkest time in my life.”
What Happened Next
OP’s parents divorced, and per their prenup, OP’s mother walked away with most of their assets (since she also contributed more to the family income). OP’s mother never forgave her dad for what he did and never talked to him again.
However, she grudgingly allowed OP to have whatever relationship OP wanted to have with him.
What Did OP Do
OP eventually forgave her dad mostly because she was tired of carrying so much anger and hurt in her heart. She talked to him but wanted nothing to do with his mistress or OP’s half-sister.
What Happened Next?
OP’s mother died last year and left OP everything – her money, her real estate assets, and her business, which OP now owns and operates. OP is in a relatively comfortable financial position, while OP’s dad is… getting by. He was never a good businessman and lost much money on businesses.
What Happened Next
Recently, OP’s half-sister was diagnosed with a life-threatening sickness this year, and she has been in the hospital for the last four months. The bills are mounting, and OP’s dad came to me for help because they are now in a situation where they are finding it challenging to come up with the money for OP’s half-sister’s treatment.
What Did OP Do?
OP says, “The thing is, I don’t want to use my mother’s money to pay for the treatment of the child her husband had with his other woman.
Though it’s not my half-sister’s fault, it feels so unfair when I think that the money my mother worked hard all her life for will go to a child that neither my mother nor I have any responsibility towards, and the very same child of the man and the woman who hurt her so much at that.”
What Does OP Say
According to OP, she would instead use it to grow her company and let her dad and half-sister’s mother figure out how to get money for her treatment. They are her parents, after all. The only thing tying OP to her is OP’s father saying, “She is your sister,” and “If she dies because she didn’t get the treatment she needs, would you be able to sleep at night?”
OP wants to know if she is being an a jerk for doing this.
Shameful of Your Father
“I’m so sorry you’re in this position. It’s shameful your father is putting this burden on your shoulders; I imagine he’s scared for your half sister’s life and desperate to find a life-saving solution. Still very inappropriate and unfair to you, though. What a heavy situation. Have you talked to a therapist?”
How Dare He
“Your dad cheated on your mother and now wants to guilt trip you into caring for a child that he helped create? Your dad, the guy who ruined his marriage and pretty much any good relationship with you?
It’s sad for the little girl, but you have no obligation to her, and unfortunately that’s the reality. She’s not someone you know, I assume, or ever had any relationship with.”
Let Them Figure It Out
“as long as it doesnt interfere with your sister getting medical treatment let them figure out the bills. Millions of parents have to pay their own children’s medical bills with no help”
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This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.