A user asked, Am I wrong for swearing at a coworker for contacting me while on “Do Not Disturb”?

Backstory

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The Original Poster (OP) has a coworker who comes to OP for assistance. OP is comfortable with that. 

However, when OP is on “Do Not Disturb” in Teams, he will send OP multiple emails or call OP on his phone. It’s nothing important, just minor stuff that could wait until the meeting(s) ends.

OP Told Him To Wait

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OP says, “I’ve talked to him three or four times, telling him that he needs to either wait or if he must email me it has to stop at one, and I’ll reply when I can. He’s sent emails every few minutes asking for an answer. If I decline his call, he’ll call right back.”

He’s been talked to by management about this.

OP Sent Him An Email

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Last week, OP sent him a terse email when he emailed several times during an important meeting.

The email read, “STOP. I’ve told you I’ll get back to you when I can. If I’m on Do Not Disturb, that doesn’t mean ‘unless your name is Joe.’ This is the last time I’ll be polite.”

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OP Sent Him A Rude Email

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Finally, he emailed OP again on Monday. Multiple times. So, OP replied with something like “Do you know how to freaking read? Have you listened to a goddamn thing I’ve said? Do not disturb means leave me the f alone. We’ve had polite conversations about this, but I’m going to be more blunt: F. OFF. You’re actively hindering my work.”

He and a few coworkers claim OP was a jerk and out of line for swearing at him and being “demeaning”.

That’s Harassment

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“Do you know how to freaking read? Have you listened to a goddamn thing I’ve said? Do not disturb means leave me the freak alone. We’ve had polite conversations about this, but I will be more blunt: F***. OFF. You’re actively hindering my work.”

You are wrong and a jerk to yourself for that. That can get you in trouble with HR for harassment. Don’t let the real jerk (your coworker) off the hook by stooping to his level. You, your boss, and your coworker need a come to Jesus meeting.

Your coworker is a jerk, too. Going with Everyone is a jerk. Don’t put things like that in writing (email, teams, whatever). That can get YOU in trouble.

You Can Get Fired

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‘I’m in HR and OP would be either fired or final warning. I absolutely understand OPs viewpoint, but they can also mute notifications as in they don’t pop up on your screen while working. The calling tho not sure how to mute that.”

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You Are A Jerk

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“Everyone is a jerk here – your coworker sounds like a nightmare, honestly.

You are a jerk because you responded in a way that turned an inconvenience into a hostile work environment. What are you doing checking your emails during a meeting anyway? That’s on you. If you’re annoyed by the notification sound, then turn off your notifications. You can prevent calls by taking your landline off the hook or setting up DND on your mobile phone.”

Bad Conduct

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“You are a jerk to yourself because now you’ve probably opened up to being written up/reprimanded for conduct. I’m not saying he’s not annoying, it sounds like it, but in a professional setting, this was not the move to make. Hopefully, your boss and/or HR will have some level of understanding, given that you said management has spoken with him about this before, but he could spin this as retaliation.”

Noone Deserves To Be Treated That Way

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“You ae a jerk. No one deserves to be treated that way. Go to your boss every time he does it, cc him & the boss on an email that he continues to call/email while you’re on DND but don’t call him names like that.”

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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.

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