When you do something of your own interest, it is your responsibility to commit yourself to it. It is not fair to blame others; no one will save you, even people who are very dear to you.
She wanted to participate in a 5k running event but she did not commit herself and failed at it miserably. She is blaming her boyfriend for ditching her.
A user asked the forum, “Am I a jerk for ditching my girlfriend at a 5k because I wanted a better time?”
BACK STORY
The original poster ( OP ) [36m] and his girlfriend [31f] have been together for about two years now and they live together.
About nine months ago, he picked up running as a hobby, and he has since grown quite fond of it.
HE FOUND AN INTERESTING EVENT IN THE CITY
He currently runs an average of 25 miles a week. A few months ago, he decided he wanted to try a 5k or 10k, and after some Google, searching found a 5k in his city that looked fun.
WHAT DID HE DO?
He registered for it, paid the fee, and decided to start training specifically for it.
He mentioned it in passing to his girlfriend that night, and she asked if she could come too.
HE SUGGESTED HER START TRAINING
He was psyched about the idea of running a 5k with her and agreed, but he warned her that she would probably want to start training because he was going for a sub-27-minute time, which might be tough for a complete beginner.
She said she would like to train with him, which, again, sounded fun for him.
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
The following day he woke up at 5 am for his run, as he usually does, but his girlfriend was not up for it and told me she’d go later.
This continued for a week, and then two weeks, and finally, he managed to get her up once for a run.
SHE WAS MISERABLE
OP says that she was miserable the entire time, and he basically didn’t get any exercise.
HER STRATEGY
Last Friday, the day before the race, he asked if she was really up for it. She insisted she was. She then told him that she would just “skip-gallop” it, like she used to do with her mile, runs in middle school.
He asked her to demonstrate what a skip-gallop was, and she showed him this bizarre side-stepping gallop as if she had casts on her legs.
SHE WAS CONFIDENT ABOUT HER STRATEGY
He told her it seemed like a really inefficient way to run, but she insisted it always worked for her.
Saturday was the race day, and right out of the gate, she utilized her skip-gallop strategy.
WHAT DID HER GIRLFRIEND DO?
Two minutes in, he realized that she was already completely gassed. She started asking him to wait so they could walk together.
WHAT WAS OP’S RESPONSE?
But he apologized, told her that he loved her, and left her behind to finish the race.
He ended up with a time of 26:43, beating his goal.
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
After the race, he tried calling her, but she wouldn’t pick up. When he returned to the car, he realized she had left him.
He took an Uber home, and right when he walked in the door, he was met with cry-shrieking about how he had left her.
SHE WAS GIVING A SILENT TREATMENT
He tried to calm her down and explain that she kind of brought it on herself, but she was not interested whatsoever.
OP says that the previous day she gave him the silent treatment all day. He asks, “Do I deserve what I’m getting here?”
Now OP wants to know if this is wrong.
YOU ARE NOT WRONG
“Not a jerk.
She chose to invite herself. She chose not to prepare. And she chose to make a fool of herself with her crazy method of “running.”
This is all on your GF. I’m glad you had your phone and/or wallet and were able to get home after she abandoned you.”
SHE SHOULDN’T HAVE RUN WITH YOU
“You had a goal, told her well in advance. She shouldn’t have ran with you if she knew that she wasn’t going to be able to keep up.”
SHE IS A RED FLAG
“You warned her and spoke with her weeks ahead. But I will be honest, her leaving you and that upset is a lot of red flags, in my opinion.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.