Do you have a question in your mind that you’re curious about but feel it might not be appropriate to ask transgender people about it?
A netizen recently asked, “What’s something you wish you could ask transgender people without judgment?”. Have a look at the top responses below!
DO PERIODS GO AWAY?
“Do periods go away when you start taking shots of testosterone? Is there a way to get rid of them without surgery?” asked one.
“For some folks, yes; for some folks, no. Some IUDs (Intrauterine Devices) can stop periods, like Mirena, or for some, taking birth control without the sugar pill, a week can contain periods.
For transmasculine folks, the most reliable way to get rid of periods is by having a total hysterectomy with oophorectomy, which also helps reduce the amount of estrogen in the body,” another added.
CAN YOU CHOOSE A SIZE?
“Do you get to choose the size of your thing during phalloplasty?” asked one.
“For transgender guys, it depends on how much skin they can safely graft, I think. But after the maximum is established, yes!” another added.
HOW DOES SITTING DOWN FEEL POST-SURGERY?
“Does sitting down feel different after you get a surgery done down there?” asked one.
“At least for me(transgender woman), sitting down three months after bottom surgery is hard. You’re still recovering, and all the irritated flesh is very painful. Then, eventually, sitting down is the same, except that I no longer have my privates in the way.
However, for me personally, when I sit down, my belly button feels weird because my nerve endings regrew incorrectly,” another replied.
IS CHANGING NAMES NECESSARY?
“For those born with unisex names such as Alex, do you still need to change your name to reflect your new identity?” asked one.
“My sister was born with a unisex name but decided to change it when she transitioned. She chose an old lady type of name; I think it makes it easier for people that have known her since before she transitioned to get her pronouns right,” another added.
DOES SEXUAL ORIENTATION CHANGE AFTER TRANSITIONING?
“If, for example, someone is born male but transitions to be female and they are sexually attracted to men, are they considered ‘gay’ before the transition but then ‘straight’ after the transition?” asked one.
“I’d say so; one of my transgender friends was out as gay in her earlier years, but after she came to the conclusion she was transgender and transitioned, she is straight!” another added.
WHAT ABOUT GENDER FLUID PEOPLE?
“Do non-binary people, or people who are gender fluid count as transgender, even if they still mostly present as their assigned gender at birth with no intent to change?” asked one.
“Sometimes they consider themselves transgender, and sometimes they don’t, but from what I’ve seen, most of the time they do. So by default, I count them as transgender, unless an individual says they prefer otherwise,” another added.
DO YOU FEEL GENDER DYSPHORIA IN THIS CONTEXT?
“Is it possible to feel gender dysphoria in the sense that you’re not enough of your assigned gender? Like, your body is closer to the middle of the scale than you’d otherwise identify?” asked one.
“It can! A great example of this happening was when Norah Vincent was doing her research for Self-Made Man. After living as a man for about 18 months, her dysphoria was so bad she was thinking of killing herself,” another added.
IS IT OKAY NOT TO BE ATTRACTED TO TRANSGENDER WOMEN?
“I’m a lesbian, but is it rude for me to say I wouldn’t be intimate with a transgender woman if she hasn’t had bottom surgery? Being transgender isn’t the issue, but I do not want a penis anywhere in/near me in that context,” asked one.
“Preference is something we all have; I don’t see it as problematic in the least,” another replied.
WHAT’S THE ULTIMATE TRANSITIONING POINT?
“When is the point where you go, ‘Okay, from this day on I will be a (insert new pronoun here)’?” asked one.
“It usually takes quite a while to come out, and after that, using the person’s preferred pronouns and name, alongside not treating them differently than you would others of the same gender, is all we ask; no need to pander just treat transgender women as women and transgender men as men,” another answered.
DOES HORMONE REPLACEMENT THERAPY RESULT IN STEREOTYPE GAINS?
“Does HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy) result in any stereotype gains? Like, do transgender women steal fries more? Do their feet get cold at night now? Do transgender men start the head nod thing? Are they more fascinated by the tool aisle in Home Depot?” asked one.
“I know most of these are silly, but the cold toes thing is a yes! Estrogen tells the body to constrict peripheral (limbs) blood vessels to warm the core because that’s best for bodies that can get pregnant. The result is colder fingers and toes,” another added.
DO YOU EVER MISS YOUR OLD IDENTITY?
“Do you ever miss being the gender you were before?” asked one.
“Sometimes when I walk into a men’s bathroom and see poop on the wall, I dream of using the women’s bathroom,” another replied.
WHAT DOES TRANSGENDER FEMALE MEAN EXACTLY?
“So when someone says transgender female, does that mean they were born male and transitioned to female or the other way around?” asked one.
“The focus is always on who they want to be seen as, not who they were seen as,” another added.
HOW TO HELP MY TRANSGENDER KID?
“How can I help my kid so their life is not made harder because of being transgender?” asked one.
“Don’t reveal their identity to anyone, not even family or friends; let them choose when they are ready to tell. Call them by their chosen name (if they have one), advocate for them so their school and doctors will call them by that name as well,” another added.
IS IT NECESSARY TO USE THE WORD TRANSGENDER?
“Can I just refer to transgender men as men and transgender women as women? If I’m speaking to a group of people I know all use the pronouns she/her, will it be okay to say Hi, ladies? Online, it’s always transgender women, this transgender woman that, but like it’s fine to say, woman, right?” asked one.
“Yes, and it’s generally polite to do so,” someone replied.
HOW CAN I HELP TO SUPPORT THE TRANSGENDER COMMUNITY?
“How can I help to support transgender people in my community?” asked one.
“One of the most common ways is donating to charities like the Trevor Project. Also, just waving a pride flag out is support. There are countless other ways you can support transgender people in the community,” another replied.
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This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.